Milán had rather chew dust than Iraw her pocket book for $r5 a veek for a street sprinkler. The Saline Observer wants a gang )lank between the village high I chool and the state university. Steve Devine, of Dexter, has become a baggageman at Ann Arbor. t is hoped that devine grace willatend his slinging of baggage. An auction and pole-raising were I o have come off at Whittaker, last veek. The auction was a failure )ut the Cleveland pole went up with a huzzah. Peter Hines, of Ypsilanti, jumped off amoving freight train. As to he prudence of the move, his mind s open to conviction. At least he las a gash in his head, six inches ong. Dexter, last week had a $30,000 care and a Si, 000 loss by fire. The illage either has no squirt-gun or t was out of order, but a bucket brigade accomplished miracles and saved the town. The prohibsof Washtenawcounty ïave nominated for probate judge, NToah Cheever, one of .the best inormed probate lawyers in Michigan. rïis]"probate practice," is the standard text book in use in this state. Ex-Gov. Luce addressed the recyit Bridgewater farmers' picnic. The old gentleman, though mingling reely with the farmers, keeps the juckwheat chaff out of his eyes as ie sits along the barrel of the senatorial smooth-bore. ♦ . t While the farmers are in a state of lament, over the small wheat erop, Vnn Arbor city takes honest pride n a luxurousgrowth of Canada this;les, seen on the grounds óf the Standard oil company. Those wishng seed can nowbe accommodated. Washtenaw people should wear ron nozzles or carry their noses in heir pockets. The Press, last week, reported two distressing accidents due to a want of this precaution, and now learns that John Reymond, a Willis man, has had his bugle 'busted" by a blow from an iron setting-maul, in the hands of a"crósseyed nïan, while putting up a swing. "A little dark-haired and curlyïeaded daughter, weighing eight sounds, was born to Mr. and Mrs. [. C. Fingerle, last Friday evening. Vlother, father, and grand-parents all doing well." - Milan Democrat. Whether the father, mother, and prehistorie ancestors of the young woman are doing well or ill, cuts no igure in the public mind, which is ost in admiration of her excellent taste in banging her hair before apjearing in company. A splendid effort at philanthropy ïas met with persecution and imjrisonment at Ann Arbor. George jreenville, a painter of that city, requested Jacob Anspaugh to go over to Ypsilanti with him and assist in strengthening the attenuated relations between' the two cities. Anspaugh, however, refused, and Greenville, thinking still to win him over, shot him in the arm and was mmediately hopped Jupon by the cops, run into jail and placed under S500 bonds. Alas! how oft have stripes and imprisonment rewarded the noblest efforts to establish the universal brotherhood of mankind! Let us pray! Mr. and Mr. Hiram Welsh will be satisfied if the village of Manchester shall pay them $4,000 because their horse backed off the embankment of a bridge. Where Manchester made her mistake was in not having an alderman handy to push on the horse, when he began to back up. H # # 4 Commenting on the explosión of various scientific health theories - including that concerning fish as a brain food - the Ypsilantian remarks: ''We must worry along, it seems, the best we can with such brain tissue as can be got out of beefsteak and potatoes, and boiled pork and cabbage - and won 't it be rough on the public!" We submit that Smith & Osband have seized upon a mere excuse to parade their bill of fare before their less fortúnate brethren. This was not quite polite. Here, "devil!" - bring us that slab of cold johnnycake in the roller-box - and the salt. "Why do birds in their little nests agree?" asked the pretty schoolma'am of Freddy Fangle. "Cause they'd fall out if they didn't," Freddy replied. "I am always moved by the sound of music," aaid young Phathead as the clock struck 11. "Let me play something for you," said Miss Uplate, with sudden eagerness.