Chips And Shavings

Two thieves worked for a half hour and broke into a South Chester, Pennsylvania butcher shop and got one nickel as their booty. One of the squires of Oil City was reoently called upon to marry two young people of that vicinity. He had pronoucced the usual question, "Do you take this woman foryour lawfully wedded wife," etc. , when he was interrupted by the groom with the question, "Say, squire, what in thunder else do you think I got you to come here for?" A Sunday school teacher was trying to impress upon hls pupils the care of the Deity for all living things, great or small, and getting to the peroration of his address he said: "The Lord who made the mountain made the little blades of grass. The Lord who made the oisean made the pebbles on the shore. The Lord who made me made adaisy." And then he wondered why.the cl.ass burst into laughter.