A hoary headed oíd rascal, of Salem is under arrest for immoral attentions toward a ten year oíd girl. What, with a runa.way and a leg and arm broken, Sam Seney, of Lima, had all the excitement he could manage for one day. Detroit is now claiming over 300,000 population, and this stimulates Chelsea to rise up and say she has 1,573, counting the last one born. Henry Gotts, of Whittaker, has been invested with the rank and epaulettes of a deputy sheriff. Henry got some prisoners right away. # No county fair in Washtenaw this season. Pumpkins and beets that nave lain awake nights, growing for ist premium have simply wasted strength. A rope-walker at Milan, risked tiis life last week for the amusement of a large crowd, who gave him so little that he feit like dropping off the rope and killing a few people by the fall. M. Bell, of Dexter, claims to have killed in one day, recently, fortynine snakes. Poor fellow. If he only would go there! But he says he has no faith in it. "Bell should ring off." It is evident that the horse editor of the Commercial overstepped (?) his bounds when he put the notice of a new song under the heading "Horse Neighs." - Ypsilantian. "Don't that kill a horse?" Now we know what is the matter with Gen. Weaver. It is wind on his stomach. But the Ann Arbor Argus, commenting on his four column speech, with one slash of the knife, contracts his bowel-girth considerably. Spontaneous combustión is supposed to have burned the Burner barn in Dexter township, last week. One hundred tons of hay, 700 bushels of wheat and two hogs were among the assets spontaneously combusted. The Milan Leader says: "Among other things dissolved by the recent rains is the firm of Van Wormer & Lockwood. John Lockwood has sold his interest to his partner who will continue the business." Milk, or saloon business? Deputy Sheriff Leonard, of Ann Arbor, was caught in a storm the other day and took shelter in a York bard. The barn was unroofed in a 'York minute" and it looked like Leonard was going to get justice for some of his unholy shoulder-clapping; but he escaped. # Chas. Thomas and Geo. Hopkins, colored, of Ypsilanti, being arrested for stealing a sack of flour, were defended with so much vigor, by J. P. Kirk and E. P. Allen, that the jury acquitted and and disagreed as to the other - the prisoners, not the counsel. How does this policy of trying to free wool, accord with Capt. Allen's campaign speeches? m The Ypsilanti Maccabees having in the finance keeper's hands 150, with a like sum to come in during September, some of the younger members moved to "rake the treasury, and give a $300 'blowout. '" It was decided to do this in imagination and put the actual cash into a permanent lease and furnishings. On the night before his return from the encampment, Lieut. J. P. Kirk, lay snoring in his tent, dreaming of future glory and triumphs gory, on blood-soaked battle-fields; nor realized he the presence of the gaant wolf, financial depression. And yet, at the very hour when his admired dream did most ravish his unwaked senses, a thief stole his pocketbook and $60 from under his pillow. A child of W. Richards feil down a 24 foot well in York, Sunday of last week. The father had been to considerable trouble to raise the little Jad, and concluding he was worth saving, tied a rope about himself and had some other persons let him down. The rope broke and Richards pounced down on the boy, both going down and nearly knocking the bottom out of the well. A second hitch proved successful and the two generations were hauled to the surface. It always pays to cover a well with boards and leave a hole about a child's size. It relieves the monotony of married life. The office of the town clerk of Ann Arbor town is not "under the bridge." The report probably arose from the fact that Clerk Widemann passed some portion of his time there last week. He was not there of his own free will and accord. He had no business there and was surprised to learn that he was there. Fact is, the colt he was leading jumped off the bridge and Mr. Widemann, having the halter twisted about his hand, did not feel it liberty to desert the animal. TJiat is why he was there with the finger out of joint. Let no one be proud or feel that he is above others, simply because he holds office. There are some humorous features in the Bridgewater shooting case of last week. Godfried Sauer, drunk and crazy over a "jilt" by his girl, shot himself three times in the door yard of Col. Fenn, for whom the ;irl worked, and would probably ïiave shot the girl, if the Colonel had allowed him to see her. Hearing the shots, the family opened the front door and Sauer lay apparently dead. The Colonel went to the barn for his horse to drive for a coroner, and Mrs. Fenn remarked, "Well Godfried is dead and can't hurt us now." Just then the dead man walked in, blood covered, revolver in hand andscared the women nearly to death. As Col. Fenn was driving away, somebody called to him to "halt" and there stood the "dead" before him, revolver in hand. Fenn drove for a sheriff and the dead man washed up at the pump, sprang into his own buggy and passed the sheriff and colonel without being recognized. For a corpse the fellow Sauer proved a very "active transitive verb."