Adrian Press Washtenawisms

"Miss Anthony is beginning to show ' her age," says the Courier Ü. of M. notes. So is the sphinx. Chelsea turns over in her bed o'nigbts like a victim of a miduight minee pie, in restless envy of Dexter's new town clock. The editor of the Milan Leader, listened toSusan U's lecture at the U. of M. hall, and substantially confesses that he experienced a queer feeling around the edges of nis heart. ïhe Leader credits the salvation of at least half of Dexter. to the night vraten, who discovered and smothered in its babyhood, a dangerous íire. Yes the man woke up at the right moment. On her arrival at the school house the other iuorning, Miss Josie iloppe the pretty school inarm, was suvprised to tind that a beau had preceded her, and was seated by a roaring fire. He was a big, dirty tramp. The University sewer lias become ehoked. Workmen are endeavoring to tind where the trouble lies.- Arm Arbor Eegister. Probably one of the llegister's antisewer editorials has got into it. The great speech of Lawyer Savyyer, in the Hand murder case, filis eighteen columns of the Ann Arbor Registei'. And to think that the prisoner was compelled to listen to all that and go to the penitentiary Lor life besides. The iron-hearted tax collector of Manchester has lèvied on the only anTil in a blacksmith shop to satisfy a iog tax, and would iaugh to see the Vulcan try to '-turn a shoe" on the ■horn" of the dilemma. This is peeling tlie ubark" pretty close. Rev. Sylvester Calkms,aged 7ö years, president of the village of South Lyon, is about to marry a bachelor girl aged 5(5. If any person knows ought why these two should not be joined in marriage, let him speak his piece now, or forever alter hold his "vip." . # The large and costly ruustache, belonging to A. F. Freeman, of Manchester, was totally destroyed by h're last week. No insurance. Mr. Freeman looked into the coal stove, and coincidental therewith carne a puft' of blazing coal gas. Mr. .Kreeuian has labeled the seat of the conllagiation "The burnt district." The Press had said something about ;he taviff, infant industries, and the t'alling off of marriage in Hillsdale ounty, whereupon the Ann Arbor Dourier observes: "Ilow a jester does iometimes speak the truth unintentionally." Ilow might the Couner honor itself in such u breaeh of vigilance in its tariff talks. This ñora the Ann Arbor (Jourier, refera to the president's Hawaiian poliey: Queen Lill's rotten inonarchy must be restored, tliough blood runs like water through the streets of Honolulú. The cry is for blood ! blood ! blood ! Fetch the blood-bucket. somebody- and be mighty quick ! The Couner is having another hemorrhage ! "The. soul of heavy tragedy is at woik in Dexter, trying to qrganize a democratie club,'" etc. This item froni a recent number of the Press has gone the rounds till it is out of breath. V desire to state in this connection. that immediately after the appearance of this now jaded paragraph -'the soul of heavy tragedy" was at work in this office, on the compositor who set up "democratie" for dramatic, and who Cailed to correct the error when it was markéd. Usually we have "nopleasure in the death of him that dieth," but there are instances when virtne ceases to be forbearance. Geo. II. Jackson and Thomas J. Kice of Ypsilanti, have jointly concocted and brought out a murderous device designed to opérate agaínst the health of safe-burglars. it is so contrived that upon the slightest agsiression it irritates a battery of revolvers, wbleh lire in all directions till the chambers are exhausted, iilling the burglar as f uil of holes as a session iaw of the last legislatura. The theory and practice of this device seem to till a long feit want, but there is danger of over rilling it. Suppose a green clerk or th'oughtless proprietor, or cashier, should blunderingly fumble the safe and fail to be recognized by the machine'. Funeral of a well ventilated corpse, the third day after, and an obituary notice stating that deceased was a good neighbor, a kind father, and an affectionate husband, but vvholly deficiënt in his knowledge of the Jackson & Kice Instantaneons Burglar Eradicator.