Washtenawisms

The small-pox strike is over at rpsilanti. The doctors oan put up the;r bayonets. Anürew Miller, a prominent farmer BOUtfa oi Ypsilanti, is suftering trom a recent stroke of paralysis. It is expected tliat the first floor of the psilanti high school will be ready for occupancy by Sept. 10. A five-year-old child of Charles Finkbeinev, near Saline, was killed by the kick of a horse, last week. A dog owued by Mr. Robbins, of Augusta, died last "week f rom swallowiiig a streak of lightning. Tobias Laubengayer, of Weinsbsrg, who was recently overeóme with heat, now has a prospect of recovery. The burial place of Dexter's departed will hereatter rob death of some of its terrors by assuming the beautiful title of "Forest Lawn Cemetery." Rev. Dan. Shier, president of the Morenci Black Bass Club, arrived hut week at bis familiar tishiiig ground at Wampler's. The fish seemed tickled to death to see the eider. Among recent wind tragedies aro and Milan was the killing of six sbeep, a norse and a dog. Other and inore fatal calamities by ''wind" are booked to occur later in the campaign. We neglected to inention last week the niarriage of Rha Couklin, of Lansing, to Miss Ella Leek, of Clinton.- Manchester Enterprise. The affair had already leaked out, however. In trying to revive the old days when everybody rode on horseback, George Lynch, of Saline, was last week unloaded from his steed so suddenly that he has since sported a broken arm. William H. Crabb, of Ypsilanti, was recently married to Miss Grace Watson, of West Bay City. He was a charmed Crabb, - not " deviled", as hotel bilis of fare profauely Dut it. Fifteen couples walked for the cake at the Fourth of July colored cake walk at Ypsilanti. Won by Tobias Wilson and Mis. Harper. "Ca've dat cake" and stnd a slice to the Argus office. The Chelsea city governrnent has hastened so slowly in the matter of waterworks that mauy citizens have put up windmills and told the council to go to that other place where there are no watenvorks. In opening his pioneer address Mr. Charles Woodruff stated that he had written down truths in a "gyninastic dress," and his explanation that this meant "uaked truths,"' was an unpardonable tautology. While many editors esteem theniselves in luek these hard times to get liold of a slab of cold corn bread, tüe editor of the Milan Leader sits in his den gorging himself on wedding cake. Stoma-cake seize him! Miss Lena Foster has been appointed assistant postmaster at Chelsea. The critica having given Lena a close inspection through theil' glasses, concede Hie appointmeut to be good and the w is now piactically closed. The quacU'uple politica) debate at AYhitmore lake by guberuatorial eandulates, will doubtless attract a large crowd ou the 25th Each candidate wil] have a "swiper," it is said, who will spouge lnin off after his elïort. Justice Childs, of Ypsilanti, opened his office on the 4th of July and liad a drunk the next day. The squire did not get f uil, bvit another feliow did. He was trom Belleville, so the court socked it to him, üve dollars and costs. A yonng man cannot make a success in lite unless he works.- Chelsea Herald. No, but he should prepare himself to work intelligently by taking a college course. Many a gradúate is now earning trom 50 to 75 cents a day as a farm laborer. Ypsilanti and the public generally owes rmich to the promptnéss with which the authorities oí' the above town jumped upon the small-pox with its aggregated feet and staniped the life out of the disease-germs before they had an opportunity to spread. The Township Board has deeided to have the town hall thoroughly overhauled. It will be redecorated, electric lights put in, new scènes painted and the old ones retouched, and the furnaee will be repaired or a new one uut in il found uecessary.- Chelsea Herald. Eighteen poor strikers camped near Ypsilanti one day last week. They were so depressed over the situation and had the cause of the country so much at heart that several small kegs of beer were rpquired to assuage their sorrow. There was plenty of money in the gang. MÍA ■_ 1 1 1 i, M I I . M. A. Lowry, president of the Chelsea fair association. wants every boy or girl '-who lias any mechanieal ability, to make something in wood, i ron, brasa or steel, and bring it to our fair for exhibition." Mina now, ehil'n, either mako something in wood, iron, brass or,- steal. The editor ot the Chelsea Herald don t mind being kept awake by cats till most morning, but tightens the line when serenaders with guitar and catarrh, hetchel his soul with "After the BalP"; and he gets so mad thinking about it that he splits the article squarely in two, in the make-up. Wm. E. Stocking is the authorized statistician of the labor bureau for Washtenaw county. Farmer, if a person of that name calis on you, make him show his commission with the seal of the Labor Commissioner. If he re fuses, he is no Stoeking- sock it to him. He is a swindler with a scheme. The Argus' "blanc mange and whipsyllabub' are designed to be swallowed immediately afteroneof the Sentinel's serial editorials on "Pontius Pílate "- Argus. All right! We'll furnish the dinner, and you furnish the desert "Non omnes possumus omnia."- Sentinel. Bargain. Now ca've dat non omnes possum." In referriug to Capt. E. P. Allen, the Ypsilantian says, "We notice that all democrat papers unite in deprecating his nomination, but is it because they would feel bad to have the republican candidate defeated? We trow nottheir wish is to elect a democrat and' that is why they are seized with a strange sort of fear and tremnling when Captain Allen's name is mentioned." This is what the Ypsilantian trows, and when it trows anything it seldom allows anybody to out-trow it. VVhittaker was gide-trackécl last week. uní uiaile all her purehases in Ypsilanti. Ligüttiing limi h atraw stack near Saline last week and the barn of John Ta te, together vvitu ita uexei.liiauaeuis, appurteoances and belongings, would have become au iöU-jile, but ror the activity of the tire departan ut. Tlie boys were "ÜKhtning"' and had water ou the stack betore the tliunder-clap ceased to róar. , Couiit Wearilousiowski's detachment of Brigadier General Cuchran's división of Major Genera! Coxey's arniy of ' the Couimonweal of Jestis Christ in! the United States (we believe that is the style of it) reached Ypsilanti this noon froui Milan- 98 tatterdemalion j Polea and Huns. P. S- We got the! count's name wrong. It is Ry leko wski. ! - Ypsilanti Coujiiiticictl. Cbas. Bycraft, of rpsilauti, on the night befoie the 4tli, stooped to scrape up the powder that lntd spiüed out of a bottle in his pocket, when a tooi eompanion threw a ligbced match on itand svvish, boom, bah! went the whole business. Bycraft's cheek and hair weré burned, but he saved his eyes, and can still see to lick the idiot joker, vvlien he linds liim. Amona; the prominent Ann Arbor gentlemen whom we iwticed on our utreets yesterday weie Hou. J.ï. Jacobs and ex-lJosttuaster E. E. Beal. - Dexter Leader. Mr. Jacobs will not seek the otRce, believing, as he does, n letting the office seek the man. At ;he same time he is au obliging gentleman who would not purposely put ;he office to the trouble of tryiug to find where he is concealed, henee, . A pug deg, frothing at the mouth and evidently in a climax of the rabies, last Thursday eyening, rushed into the house of Dominico Pastorino, of l'psilanti, and treed him up a chair. It would be hard to say whether Dominico or the dog exhibited the strongest evidence of bydrophobia, bat the tormer flnally got hold of his gun and, dogmatically speaking, put the pretty pug pup to sleep. He had been poisoiied. In Saline township, last week, while the heavens we re hung with black and festooned with lurid chains, and amid the roar of heaven'a artillery, bolts of death were darting through unfathomable regions of tiery hetnispheres (whew! uiakes us sweat), Ira Biddle's old dog lay snoring and jerking with delight in pleasant dreams; vvhen suddenly a blinding flash shot athwart the skies, a crash like the shock of contending moráis shook the universe, a id when it was over Biddle's dog was dad! Feeling that we have done everytlriug tor the dog that we could, we hereby commit the corpse to the Willis obituary writer.