Additional Roundabouts

"VV'hy are people dishonest?" inquires the Plyraouth Mail. That's what we can't seejbut there are only a few of us vvho actually are otherwise. Our venal coatemporaries are all dishonest - all of them lying on credit rather than teil the truth for cash. But there are a few honest hearts still beating beneath ragged vests. The Dutchman was right, - Honesty is der best bolicy, but it keeps a man tam poor." Mrs. Butler, of Hamburg, employed Henry Whitlock to work her farm, and afterwards took a dislike to him and invited him to créate a vacuüm in the atmosphere around there, but he refused and feil sick. Suspected food was analyzed and strychnine found therein. Then Mrs. Butler took a big hunk of opium, and at last aceount was likely to be translated. The hired man has recovered, and seems quite frisky for his toning up. Erastus Champlin, of Liberty township, Jackson county, aged 90 years, is the oldest person in the town. The best that Springport can do is to trot out a man of 86 as its most ancient inhabitant. Several other Jackson towns have no oldest inhabitant. It is written, "The wicked shall not live out half theirdays." In Washtenaw a youth of 90 is scarcely old enough to court a girl. The Fenton Independent office was broken into last week and over #40 taken from the safe. - Pinckney Dispatch. It serves the editor right. It -is just such greedy hoarding as this that has brought our country to its present crisis. With the nation in the throes of a great strike and the wolf of hunger howling before the hovels of the poor, the millionaire editor of Fenton had $40 stuck away in his safe. How just is the retribution of Omnipotence! The populists are right in their demands, but they scarcely differ in any essential respect from those of the democratie party. Why, then, the folly of a división of forces when unanimity is so esssntial. - Lansing State Democrat. Well, you see it is a case of the tail wanting to waggle the dog. If the "pops" would be reasonable and "jine" the democrats there need be no división, but Mr. Gus Peters, who constitutes the party, refuses to fuse. May the grasshoppers kick him to death! Byron Laffler, of Milan township, together with his team, wagon and ninety bushels of corn dropped through Macon bridge Tuesday, Jast week. Byron for some minutes afterward sat on the bottom of " the river covered with water and bags of corn, reflecting what to do, but remembering that God helps those who help themselves, he concluded to give up the idea of drowning and sue the town for damages; and digging to the surface rescued his team and got home,, wounded, wet and quite mad. When the Adrián waterworks wells were drilled, a vein was struck in one of them that jielded a fluid, whicli for pungency would have made an addle egg sick to its stomach; and a hog that wallowed in the wastage, took two kinks in his tail, vomited and died. It has been discovered that this water whose silent eloquence is a tongue unto ail peoples and a language to the deaf, is inbued with the same health-giving properties as that of the Ypsilantian Mirabah with its record of remarkable cures and a rankness that reeks in the nostrils of high heaven. A sanitarium is now projected for Adrián, and the city government is moving in the matter.