Washtenawisms

Mrs. Oraian Burt, of Ypsilanti, died Thursday morning. Mary Allen, who resided on the town line between Milan and York townships, died recently of an overdose of morphine. William Long, of Ypsilanti. tor drunkenness, has achieved a 15 days sentence in jail. This will not detain William, long. Miss Lulu Burch, of Sharon, not able to keep up with lier roller skates at Wampler's lake, is suffering from a broken wrist. The Nelson circus which lately exliibited in Washtenaw, "busted" at Mt. Clemens. The actors went before the audience and said they weie through turning sumersaults fornix. It comes from Ypsilanti that Frank Kellar. the champion Washtenaw knocker, and Joe Shea are to üght to a finish in West Superior, inside of l'our weeks. What dreadful times of blood-letting these be! 3e Baptist parsonage lot at Manchester has a new bain. The minister cao now hitch up on rainy days without catching a stream of water down the back of 'nis neck, from the cornstalk roof on the slab shed. The editor of the Dexter Leader was ' not at Chelsea on Germán Day, but was over in the evening ol-aserving the , inelon rinds, empty bottles and tracks ' around tliere and remarks that there must have been a large crowd. At Willis last week, Fraternity , range assai led the question: "What caused the strike and who is , sible?" It was finally laid on the tuble to admit of further discussion of tlie subject of : "Who struck William Eatterson?" The "Willing Workers," of Rawsonville. will put up a jolly attack on peaclies atid creain tomorrow evening. Theie will be plenty of "Willing workers" at the table. Like the boy, they wil! have 110 objection to working, except "between meals." A Clinton nine went over to Manchester last week to have a bout with the lads there, uot knowing the regular team was in Brooklyn. A scrub nine was got together however and the Clinton lads were tlius enabled to go home defeated 15 to 14. The North Lake correspondent of the Chelsea Herald, referring to the fair, says: "Let all judges look beyond ïhe exhibitor and see nothing but the exhibit." Why, so they will, to be sure. Who ever heard of an unjust judge at a modern day fair? The Automatic Telephone Company have erected all the poles that they intend to at present. Thirty telephones have been ordered f rom Kokomo, Ind., and these will be placed and put in running order before any more extensión is put ou the lines. - Ypsilanti Times Local. From the breezes that blow from Mancliester it is inferred that ney a, r . rreeman ís wiuing lo ue laken aside and vehemently urged to Muid as the republican candidate for prosecuting ati'irney. ít is conceded on high authority that "fervent eñ'ectal prayer availeth uiuch" and if the prayers can be obtained. Mr. Freeman may be overeóme and consent. A flowerthief at Ypsilanti, embqldered by his remarkable perservation l'rom avenging ballets, atternpted to enter several houses one night last week. He had despoiled a number of elegant íiower beds the same night Wliy it is that the shaft of Omnipotence strikes down the pure and good, vet misses this man. challenges inquiry,to the verge of forbidden search. A conple of dirty tramps gave an exhibition on our streets of their skill as manipulators of the pipes Wednesilay. An outraged public stood it for a time and then rose in tlieir miglit and treated them to a dose of medicine to which they were evidently unt'amiliar, namely a pail of water. - Chelsea Standard. Must have totally iiiisunderstoüd their preference of d rinks. A sp;trk from a passing locomotive jired a stack at Dexter, Monday morning. The stack leaned for support on the barn of Silas Thrasher, and when the lire was discovered by C. F. Conrad tliere seemed little help for the barn, hay. grain, etc., that were inside. But Conrad was a hustler and snspending morning devotions he called for help and soou had the "fiend" under management. An onnce of get up and dust is worth a ■whole row of patents on flre extinruishers. The Comoiercial says that the socalled milk-weed, or prickly lettuce, or whatever other name it may be called ty, has complete possession ot YpsiSa'nti, except the premisesof St. John's school and First ward school and the tvro eolored churches. This seems to prove tbat the blamed Russian exotic eannot withstand the influences of reHgion and education. Let us kill the infernal foreign boni tumble weed if we have to bnild a school or a church m every comer, and all of us turn schoolmasters and preachers. George Sherwood, of Manchester, has a billiard hall in the building which stands on the land sold to the Union Savings bank, and when asked 'sosMve, made a "fancy shot" by repïyïng that he would do so for $100, he claiming a year's lease. Mr. Unterkircher offers to pay threo months' rent and help George move, but the Jatter thinks Unterkircher has made "a raiscue" and reckons that he will aeither be "kissed off" nor "knocked out of position" and whoever tries to ferce him will get a "scratch" or two, Aave a season of "nursing" and exelaim "O carrom me back" etc. Matters as at a dead-lock. ntOeera years ago. in an Illinois town, a' ragged boy with holes in the heelsof his-trousers, met one of the jeeseDt editors of the Ypsilanti Comasescia}, tackled him for a job aad got St. That youn man rose, and later whe the editor sold out, succeeded to ïiis seat on the literary soap-box. He coBtiuued to rise and all who knew Mm predicted gieat things for him. Bttt now, like a Nebraska cyclone, eomes news f rom the Omaha Bee, that this young man- protege of the Ypsi?anti editor- has fallen from liis high estáte, become a candidate for the iegislature, and it is feared will fill a tefcislator's grave. Moral - Don 't "'eviF' for the Ypsilanti man,- it"s iaugepous Marshal Fi.sk lins succeeded In robting every viluge taxpayer of Manchester. By municipal autbority, Manchester boys urider fourteen yeara of age are not allovved at large. af ter eight p. m. - unless chaparoned by a gírl. The Dexter Leader, in sweeping the political field with its magnitier, has discover in F. R. Buchauan, a democratie canidate for circuit eourt commissioner. Jacob Jedele, of Dexter, jiot being able to interpret the tongue of a seperator. was rapped ou the leg by the unuaturalized thing and had bis leg broken, Monday of last week. Justice Kelly, of Manchester, haa recently made material improvements in his residence, and appears toj be about as opulent a citizen as there is in the village. In some towns justice sleeps, but it is hawk-eyed in Manchester. While others have ''small potatoes and few in a hill" at Manchester, Frank Magín, has them as largc as a Jackson girl's foot Eíe piped a flowing well into his lot, and as far as "irish lemons" go, doesn't care if it never rains. The highway commissioner. of Sylvan, ignoring and departing from the time honored custom of his most reverned and mossgrown seniors, has greatly outraged their memory by putting gra%rel instead of mud in the road at the Center. Thedrouglit and weevil are in a conspiracy to ruin the bean erop of Willis. The failure of this supplyof Boston bean food cannot but be regarded as a calamity to the farmers and a direct and crushing blow to the obituary industry of Willis. Immer & Riedel's machine threshed 1200 bushels of wheat and oats for Arthur Lowery. last Friday. Five acres of red Clawson wheat went 41 Imsliels to the acre. We learn that , fertilizar was sown witli the wheat. - ' JJndgewater Cor. Enterprise. Tlie boy or girl, under 21 years of age, who at the Chelsea fair shall delivered the best oration, will receive the price of a luishel of raw beans. The next best will be présenter! wltta a bushel of onions. A prlze like the latter should draw tears of gratitude It is said that tlie fashiois in Lapland have not changed for a thousand years. Happy husbands. - Chelsea Herald. 'Snothing! They have not changed in the Katfir country of África, in five thousand years. There's where you get your durable fashions. The Superior cornet band has conspired with the stomach of lovers of ice cream to give a sociil tomorrow evening at the Frank Coilins place ou the Bagley farm. A dance will stir the blood anci prevent the tyrotoxiconizatioifof the cream and avert '"founder." The strike, the drouth, the campaign, the prickly lettuce and the war 'in the east have all sunk out of sight or paled into thick and musty oblivion at Dexter, for the great throbbing pulse of the people is quickened with the expectation of an early tent rendition of Uncle Tom's Cabin. The fire on the Bert Moorman place near Ypsilanti, last week, was a worse affair than was at first reported. Four barns with their contente of hay, giain, implements, etc, and $500 worth of fruit trees, wree destroyed. Loss about 36,000: Insured in the Phoenix and Hartford for between 3,000 and $4,000. The Ypsilantian is indebted to Mr. Edmund Ilendrick for a box of choice fruit of his own growing, pears and pluma which make the mouth water at the very sight of them. There, now, you Argus man who weewahed our ■'experimental gooseberries. :' don't you at your peril touch this item. It's oaded. - Ypsilantian. The Ypsilantian describes a stripyard, names the owners as Gapt. Lyiin Tuttle, and Commodore Will Tuttle, and adds : "Already they have completed one vessel of "two-boy capacity, whose dimensions are. length, 14 feet; and beam, 26 inches. with a speed capacity limited only by the amonnt of tnuscle in action." Does this descriptiou apply to the boys or the boat? Charles F. Earl, while putting in a sewer pipe for O. E. Thompson & Sons, of Ypsilanti, was the victim of a cave-in last Tuesday. It was at first thought that as ït would save funeral expenses, it would be best to level up ;he trench and let him remain; but after consultation with his family it was thought that it would pay to dig ïim out for his clothes. This was lone, and be was raised out alive and quite "kicky." The Saline council has resolved that lereafter, when anybody outside the Corporation wishes the services of the municipal squirt-gun to quell a lumin)us haystack ora northern Iight, such erson"or persons must guarantee paynent of damages in case the corpora;ion god is damaged or disabled. Saine is very caref ui of her ido!; and on reflection this is about right. Outsiders who pay no municipal taxes should not expeot the engine house deity to squirt l)Iessings on the whole outside community and stand its own damaages. Well, as we were about to remark, Mat Francisco, near Dentón, purchased a blooded lamb recently. The animal had a recorded history, and immediately after his arrival, nroceeded to make a little history on his own account. Ile walked up on the porch, and looking in through the plate glass saw another sheep his size, and says be, "I'll just haul off and smash him one, for luck." There was a sudden jingle of shivered glass, and the little lamb "with fleece as white as snow" landed in the parlor. The other sheep was knocked as completely out of time as Frank Keiler. W. W. Voorheis, of Ypsilanti town, the other day, accompanied by his son. went to the city. Somehow it, seemed as though the "governqr" never could i?et his laggard offspring started for home, but it was accomplished after much waiting, and the second edition of the Voorheis family of male descent kept the eyes of the first edition on the Belds, moon, stars and other lights and opaques, till they were right at home, when - well, the yard was fullot teams and 105 people were there. Then Mr. V. knew that he was 73 years oíd that iay. Now he can oscillate his rheumatism in an elegant gift rocking chair. tle hasn"t any rheumatism, but will ?et some for the purpose of rocking it. ' The lower story of the Seminary school building at Ypsilanti will b'e i completed in time for oecupancy, Sept. Thomas Budd made a friendly cali in Unadilla, the other day, without tying his horse. His carriage is now a 'three wheeler." A male octette is conspiring to stir the Maccabee hive, at Saline, with chhrrus that "sooth the savage breast" or till with murder the heart of peace, according to the quality of the music. A. J. Murray, of this city, shipped yeaterday two car loada mo're of wool, riiaking in all, for the season, 94,000 pounds. The last shipment went to Syracuse, N, Y., former sblpments to Boston.- Y psilantian. George Heselschwerdt, of Sylvan, while feeding a thresher last week, reeeived as large and tine a gash in the back of his hand as any man could wish. It wasn't "jast for fua," Ijüt in the reguirtr way of business. Samuel Wallace. a colored man ïiear Dentón, while boring for water last week hit a coal vein at a depth of 75 feet. The coal is of the hard variety, and -Samuel is trying to devise meañs to pump up his wiuter's supply. Bert J. Howlett, formerly a member of the Methodist choir, is now mail clerk on the M.C. R. R. between Detroit and Chicago. - Ypsilantian. VVonder how he got into the mail service? Cleveland is a Presbyterian. People at Dexter kick up such a Sunday dust going to church that wetting the streets thoroughly Saturday uights is suggested. This is a good idea, but a better and wetter one would be that of sprinkling the streets Sunday inorning. A cabbage war raged in Ypsilanti last Saturday. Prices started a -5 ets. a head. Then one flrm dropped to three, and by noon auother had tumbled to two-for-flve. Another dealer was preparing to sell his .cabbages for nothing and throw in the worms, when the demand ceased and the war ended. ■ The cherry tree incident has been -isuperseded by the apple tree crash. 1 1 Miss May Stedman, of Chelsea, while enacting the role of apple maid, was made a victitn of misplaced confidence i by a faithless hmb, which, like a bovvlegged lover, let her drop. She is suf. tering f rom bruises of the face and a spram in each wrist. Henry Van Aiken, of Salem, was ; joyously working about the gearing of nis thresbing eng'ine the other day, wheu some of the cogs reached out and grabbed him, aud iu less time than the inside of quick, it stripped hiaiof his "duds" and left hinilookmg like Adam before his interview witii the snake. Injuries slight. Rev. D. H. Conrad, of Salem, wrote one of his Chelsea rriends this week to look up Isaiah ix. 6. The result was fouud to be "Unto us a chüd is born, a son is given." The iittle stranger arrived August 13th.- Chelsea Staudard. liespectfully commended to the uotice of Rev. JJ M. Kereridge of Adrián, vvho with much holiness re1 a newspaper which had applied the above scripture in a similar inG cat events fall due in Ypsilanti on 17th of August. The Times oi S iturday says: "Yesterday was the birthda) anniversitry of thiee of the prominent citizens of this city, i3r. Rexford being 80 jears oíd. D. B. Greene 78 and City Olerk McKinstry. 40. It was aiso also on Aug. 17 that illimiintiting gas was first lit in this city, that event occürriug in 1853, and it was just a year previous that the tirst Semiüary building wasburned.