Cupid Has An Enemy

When tbc yonng man walked into the Dewspaper i timidly asked the society editor if she would kiudly iusert a noties oí his approaehing marriage, he lítele thought of the trouble he was bringing down upon his head. The aanonncement was printed Snn: day. Wheu he reached his ofiice Mouday, he found a stack of letters waiting Eor him, every one addressed in a handwriting he did not know. He whistled wheu he opeued the flrst, ditto the second, looked a bit surprised at the contents of the third and swore fluently ihrongh the balance of the pile. Atnoon there were more. At night there were others. Despite the evident curiosity of his fellow laborera in the office he did not take a soul into his confidence until the third day. Then he remarked to his deskrnates : "Say, the great American life insurance man isn't overlooking any bets these days, is he?" "Wherefore this outburst?" For answer the groom to be went to a drawer and produced a stack containing 147 letters - he said that was the exact number, thougb. hisfrienddid not count theru - the accnmulation since that fateful Snuday morning. "Every blamed one of thein is from some agent for sonie life insurance compai)y whowauta to insnre my life. Each one represents the best coiupany on the face of the earth. Each pays the largest dividends. Each invests the money of its patrons to the very best advantage. Each moralizes on the uncertainty of life and seeks to iinpress npon me the eolemu dnty I oweto my wife that is to be to get my life insured for a milliou or two of dollars. And each blessed one has come since theannonncement of my approaching wedding was printed. ' ' The young man paused a moment, then he dug into the pile and after a few moments' search produced a docnment which he shoved at his friend, siruply saying : "Just look at the devilish ingenuity displayed in the construction of that thing." The "thing" was abont the size of a theatrical poster known as a three sheet, in other words, three of them will paper the side of a bam. Down the center, at regular intervals, were a lot of mottoes and warning exhortation printed in type three times the size of the context, and ia red ink. Here is one choice extract from the document : "In the midst of lif o we are in death. ' ' "Let us cali your attention that it is eveiy husband's duty - his solerán duty - to provide for those dependent upon him. No oue knowetii when the angel of death may knock at the door of novel or mansión and how can one be prepared for his coming unless time is taken by the financial forelock? Think of the ray of hope which breaks through the clouds of bitter bereavement when the sorrowing ones refiect that by the carefnl forethought of the dear departed poverty has been provented from adding its horrors to those of the grave. It is your duty to provide for your loved ones. Do not put it off until tomorrow, for in the language of the poet, 'Tomorrow never comes. ' " There was another paragraph in the document that showed the touch of a master hand. It ran something like this : "Our policies are devised and designed to meet the wants and needs of all people desiring insurance. They are liberal. They are honest. They bring the very best returns. We have ideal policies which we can safely recommend. We can and will guarantee endowment resulta at much less than endowraent rates. And again we pledge ourselves to Enrnish paid up policies at far belowthe usual cost. Our dividends are often five times as large as those of other coinpauies on similar policies. Wealso make a specialty of making liberal loans to our clients on their policies. We are in ;he field for business and we mean to get it. And don 't yov forget it. " "Do not leave your wife and babies dopendent on chnrity. ' ' The elocutionary effect the benedict ;o be threw into the reading of these ex;racts gained him a rouud of applause 'rom his companions. Italso brought to him the knowledge that every other mau iu the office who was married - in Chicago - had been similarly affiicted. But that brought no balm to his soul, and he contimied to kick. He didn't ;hink it the proper thing to do and he announcod his intention of writing a circular letter tothe various individuals who had iinportuned him to "take a risk" and inforining them of his feelïngs. "Don 't do it, my boy, " said the head bookkeeper. "Wait until af ter you are married. You will get forty of these ;hings then to one now, and then you'll lave to get out another letter. Wait till theu, aud then you eau address yourself at one and the same time to the life insurance agent, the furniture dealer, tho grocer, the man who has a second hand sewing macuine to sell, the philan;hropist who wants to see young peopie get along and who offers you a lot way out in the suburbs that will make you rich in five years, the rental agent, the leeman, the milkman, the cockroach ex;erminator, and all their kith and km. You'll hear from them all, for they all read the society columns of the daily papers and the newly married are their legitímate prey. ' '-