Monroe Doctrine From The Democrat

Pitteen uuiversity law studwits were Intsly ''píuokea" for ïailuretoshowsatisiai:tory progres-s, aud tt e slugnard Blackftiouts uuw ülustraate the force of the adage, "No regue e'er feit the halter draw, with g ji,d opiuion of the law. " Tbus early iu ihe Rfason, John P. Kuk, a smart yoong Wasiiteuaw deruooratio lawyer, anoauoes bis oandidaoy for the ofiioe of proaeoudng attoruey. Mr. Kirk has read abous the early bini. The "worm" however, will not lie ia sight till the oloris tbaw. The oratorio o1 "The Last Judgmeut" was reudered ín the State Norrual oourse, Monday eveuing. It is devotediy hoped that rhefiual "last jndginent" wiiJ leave Ypsilanti on as safe aud pleasant footiogasdid the oratorio. "The Fortune of Englisb Synfcax," was discossed at the recent teachers' cueetiug at Saline. The "misforfune" dt' Englitsh syntax wonld have afforded a richer field Iu itsname the slaughter of "English" bas been nearly as great as would follow aviolation of the Monroe doctrine. Ypsilanti has a doctor, who -wben he ouce gets hold of afamily never Iets up. Dr. Batwell recently ministored to a ofaild, whose parents he had doctored whose grandpaieots he had served the same way and whoae gteat grandparents swallowed blue pille of bis prescribing as large as robin's eggs. He expects to dootor the nextgeueration. Concerning the burniug of a barn uear Hilan, a correspondent of a couuty exchange thus graphioally opens the ohapter: "The cry of fire Sunday moraing between oue and two o'clock, aronsed the sleeping inhabitants of progressive Milan from their sweet slnrnbers. "The following aunouucement in scare head lines.once appeared in a vill age paper: "Flame and Destruction ! Are the Fearful Horrors of Boston and Ohioago to be Repeated? The ForkedTongued Destróyer Licks with its Lurid Breath, a Lumb&r Pile! Loss $50!" A Washtenaw tramp who served ten days in jail and liked it, got drnnk the minute he was set free aud gayly plead guilt before Justice Childs of Ypsilanti. "Sixty-five days in the house of oorrection," said his honor to the prisoner, who nearly feil through his olothes as he roaied for inercy. But the heart of the oomt was as hará as a porcelain door knob, and his decree as irrevocable as that of Jnstice Hulett, oace of Adrián, and whose brow was bonnd with a wreath of eternal consistency. A tramp came before hirn. "Thirty days," snapped the magistrate. "But" iuterposed trampy, "can't yon sospeud sentence? I'll leave town at onoe. " "I said thitty days" roared the oourt. "Bnt" begao trampy again, "O jurts may exercise disoretion in - " "Conrts seldom exercise disoretion.," fairly shiieked bis honor, and the tramp was hustled to jail.