Monroe Democrat Items

The Y. M. C. A. of Ann Arbor is encouraging internperance by rneans of watermelon socials. When the last social adjourned all the inembers were "ae full as a tick. " Rev. Henry Coate, of Wauseon, was the first passenger to ride over the new Lima Northern road to Morenci. Ihe Coate seemed to fit and the railroad people put him on. Whitniore Lake dogs having heard what the Ann Arbor Courier said about it not paying to raise sneep, got at the flook of George Spicer last week, rnuttoned 38 and feit that it did pay. Fellow narned Hellaby bas jast got married at Hillsdale. As an atonement for his name he is about to enter the theologicald department of the college, aud the bride feels that the Lord has been good to give her Hellaby. A gasoline burner in the japanning room of the Ypsilanti dress stay factory exploded the other day. Nobody nould "stay" it. As soon as it bappened, Patrick Dignan, who was there, seeing that absence of body beat presence of mind all hollow, juniped out of a closed window, taking along a lot of glass, cuts and singerl hair, knocking the barber out of a job for naany waary weeks. The flames did $2,000 damage and would have killed Pat had he "stayed. " He is around proudly exhibiting his "corpse. " It has been discovered by a drummer, who pnnflded the secret to the Detroit Journal, that the curves along tbe Hurou river, on the Michigan Central are so sharp that "when freight trains go rönud some of those curves the engine has to stop until the caboose moves out of the way to avoid a tail end collision." This may seeni like an iniprobability by some, bat not to those who are acquainted with the river Eaisin's crooka. Why it is so crooked that wild ducks have often flown across it, and with chagrín, found themselves still on the same side.