WJbile Joe Gansier, of Kalamazoo, slept, a thief of "time" stole his watch frorn nnder his pillow. "Watch aud prey, " the thief 's motto. Itis unkindly alleged that the rnagnet that has welded Sherifï Judson of Washteuaw to the bosom of Pingree's political breeches, is the promise of the prison wardenship, irt case of the shoemaker's eleetion. This is uudoubtedly correct, but it's "a mean dirty trick, so there bow I" to spring it on him at this embarrassing stage of the comedy. That little bible affair between Jacob aud Esau, pales into insignificance beaide the recent lachrymose meeting between Mayors Piugree, of Detroit, and Boynton, of Port Hnron, who had been estrauged. The two are dow at one again. "Bnt tnough, on earth the tear may start, yet bliss, (spell "bliss" with a capital B) awaits the holy heart" that throbs for the single gold standard at Grand Rapids, August 5th. Tbere is a certain man in Ontonagon who w:ll hereafter be an out-and-out gold man. He swallowed a silver half dollar aud it gave him so much trouble that he had to come to the hospital here to be relieved of it, and now he has no use for the silver standard. - Washtenaw Times. A Lenawee county lad, last summer, swallowed a five dollar gold piece and was put nnder the care of fhe doctors but tbey only got back $4.75. A wealtby Ann Arbor drayman purchased an extensión table of a secondhand dealer for $1. When he drove around after it, the table had been stowed away and another dollar was demanded. The monopolist drayman replevined the table with damages, $2, to defendant. It is doubtless that Pond of the Courier, went around and stuffed the dealer full of the idea that all dollars exoept gold dollars were 50 cent dollars - probably rubbed him with some of "Spalding'sSafe (Anti)-Bimetallism." M. J. Cavanaugh, of Ann Arbor, attended the Chicago oonvention, and somehow got hold of a delégate ticket. A sergeant-at-arms observed that Cavanaugh's method of shifting his tobáceo from one side to the other, lacked something of the regulation style and ordered him to "git"; but Cavanaugh at once reached to his hip pocket and pulled the ticket on him, at the same time threateuing to report him for the insult. The poor sergeant shrank inside himself as Cavanaugh proportionally expanded, and humbly apologized. The face of M. J. Cavanaugh would flatten a bullet. He has been commissioner of schools.