Home-made Philosophy

Peeple that are not abull to govern ; themselves, are hardly fit to select anybody to run tlieir government for them. It rekwires more time to teïtch. a man how to vote, than how to read Latin; yet most men will attempt the jot of votin' for a dollar bill or less. The voice ov the peeple is werry often the voice ov pregyoodice and ignorunce; while the voice ov their leaders is mostly the voice ov the skeamer. Yisterday ís only the mernory ov a dream - termorrer is but the sequal to all our dreams, and only to-day is left in which we kin eat up the cold wittles left over from the past. A gas light and yoor employer's money is almost similar, yit exactly oppersite in their natshures - it ia about as dangerous to blow the one out as it is to blow the other in. Down our way they cali a coneervative man "A cold-storage ware-house," because he has been usin' his head durin' his huil life as a reservoir for idees that would decay in a real live head. Tyranny greases its pardners with golden ointment, and its slaves with the lash; and society is diwided into them as it has got a lump in their purse, and them that has got welts on their back. There's a good bit ov the wild goose about the averidge man or woman - they want to foller some leader when they are eore. Most any sort of a king kin work up a follerin' among the lambs that are sighin' for new pastyure and a bell-wether. I liever was brave enuff to be a medal-wearin' hero and patriot, but I swan to goodness, if I had been in a Spanish city jist after the Maine was sunk at Havana, I wud have bot a pint ot peanuts and shelled the town like a countryman on circus day. The wise men of the world have proved to the peeple that a devil is a useful and necessary article in the plan ov economy, and that hades is the left hand corner ov justice and mercy, and the peeple are sighin' because they haven't harder things to believe. If it isn't a crime to beat down the laborin' woman's wages below the level ov decent livin, thea there is no sica thing as crime, and immorality is only a figment ov a diseezed mind, and plunderin' the peeple is one ov the queer ways in which God helps the orphant. The avridge Kristshun doesn't sing atioút the head ov the rich man layin' as low as the pauper's in death- doesn't sing it with á spirit ov rejoicin' over the rich man's downfall, but becausa the averidge Kristshun sorter feela good to think he is goin' to sleep ia the same bed with the millyunaires some day soon. . 5 "■■",. .sj'í ''"