The Editor And The Tracts

"How do yon do again, sir?1' rcmarked a stony eyed lady, as she laid lier sachel on tlic mariaging editor'a desk. ,' I lefl some tracts with you a few weeks ago. Bave yon prolited by them?" "I - I tliink so," replied tlie editor, wondering what he had done with tlieni. "Tliey were very good indeed." "Were you impicsxi.d with that delihtful tract on 'The wilesof the devil as exempllfled In Uu mutiirity of man?' " asked ed the stony eyed woman, sternly. "Very much so, but I thought it unnecessarily severe on the Itepublican party. Now I don't believe " "You haven't read t," snorted the lady fiercely. "Did I jrive you 'Hell from an stheticKl standpoiut?' "I think you did, ma'am," replied the editor, "I've had it fiom every standpoint and- yes, I remember, tliat's the one tliat OppOléd youthful marriages and deiiltsuch a blow at the t'rauds in the Treasury Department. I read it " ." You did not!'1 said the lady calmly. 'Wliat's this pasted over "the broken pane? Do I understand that you plug your windows with 'Divine Providence as illustrated in the case of Deacon Pratty' What have you done wiih the 'Crowning tnerey of the Almiffhty f " "1- I took that home," stammered the editor. "Tliat's the one I re.id nights." "It's false. I see a córner of it sticking Ddt Oh, man, man ! What do you expect wtil become of your soul if you use tlie 'Cíownifif; incrcy of tb Alinighty' to stop ip rat holes?" ltmust have fallen In there," murmured he wretched ciiitor. 1 "DM the 'Sinncr's prayer for light' fall ip over that door?" demanded the lady as ] Ihe pulled the tract out of a crack in the ] loor, where it was dolng cood service as a , veather strip. Whither are you drifting, rsiating mortal I Have you perused the , Deadlygln; or, the peculiar misfortunes , 'I Williclmina Short.' "Was t attached to tbe Presiden t'a mesage?" asked the editor. "It was not. You haven't opened it. ' i íit'ru s me uevli r "He'l out in the composing room. 111 cali liim," and the bewilJered editor started up. "Yon will not,'' said the lady deeisively. "Ilere is the 'Devil' rolled up lnto cigar lighter. llave yon no care foryour immortal soul ? Show me 'Heaven's best gift to man.' " "N'asn't that something about civil service reform f asked the editor fumbling among liis papéis. "I reniember - '' "You remember nothing about it," proclaimed the lady, "and liere I tind the 'Last refujre of the unredeemed' folded In your hat." 'The bat was too large tor me," muttercd the editor, "I- I keep it there to read In tlie cars." 'And do you keep 'Tlie wandering sheep' in the neck of this bottle ?" demanded tlie womau seizlng a ginder ale flask and uutwisting tlie unhappy tract that had been uoing tluty as a cork. "linsh," Knid tlie editor, "I see it all! That belongs to the city editor, and 'tis he who has perpetrated this foul wrong." " 'Tis well you discovered it in time. Has he got 'Material Damnation ?' " "If he hasn't he will," nioaned tlie editor, "and 1 think he'sgot - " "You have deceived me. Why shonlder your sins on brm Here's 'Material damnation' scattered all around your office, and I find 'TheGrace ofGod'jabbed intothekeyhole. Oh, unregenerate man, what have you done with 'The last hours of Jeremiah Bmalletí' " "I- I was waiting for him to die," pleaded the editor. "And while waiting you wound his 'Last Hours' around the gas buiner, and here is Peter Brand' Repentance' stuffed lnto yoor slipper. Be warned, sinner! I will nowgiveyou 'Hell considered in itsrelation to the unregenerate,' " and she took tlie tract trom her sachel. "Yes. ma'am," said the editor, meekly. "And I expect to íind you immcrsed in t when I return." "Shalll giveyou 'Coiiwiete Reet'also? " " Yes, yes," clamored the editor. "Give ns that as soon as you can. That's what I want most." v eir, í naven ijrot it, l nnd ; nut liere's the 'Wall of the Abaudoned.' Kver read that?" "Some- somcthing about Jonali " asked the editor, tiniiilly. "Itisnot'!' emphasized tlie lady, more stonilythan ever. "Read it, and at the same time let me give you 'Yourself in the Kealmsof the Lost.! Prolitby theni, young man, for I shall see you agaM." And the stony lady niarched out. " Slugs," said the managing editor, appearlng at the city editor's door. "Slutrs, j ust read these over and let me have the gist of them by Monday- a sort of running account of what they are about, and you can boil down the Sunday sermons so as to get in the scandal over in Bushwick and that flght down at Red Hook. Let me have this tract business early, and don't forget that row in the Flatbush church. Ifs worth a column." And the editor sat down to an article on " The Best Way to Overeóme