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Lady Physicians

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A St. Louis doctor-factory reccntly turned out i doz'ü female doctors. As long 'as tlie f'einale doctore were contined to one or two iu thc whole country, and tliose were only experimente!, we had our peacc, :iiul did not oompluin ; but now that coliches are engaged in prodoolng female doctor! u a buuneM, w musí protest, and in so dohig 11 uvc a l'cw reasons wliy témale doctor will not . provea payingbniuch of industry. ín the tirst place, if they doctor any body t must bc women, and tliret -tourths Oí llie woineii would rat her liave a male doctor. !Su ppote tliose colleges turn out female doctors uittil tliere are as inany of tliein ai tliere are male doctors, what have they gol topnctlceonf' A man, il' there was QOthing the matter with liim, might cal] in a tanate doctors but ii' he was sick as a (if a man is sick he is as sick as a norse) the last thing he would have tround hiin would bea female doctor. Aml why? Because, when a man has a female fumblinií arouad him he wants to feel well, He dun't want to be bilious or feyerish, wltb hlfl nioulh tastiag like theese bis eyes blondshot, when the témale is looking him over and taking accouut of stock. Of courte these teníale doetors are all young aml good looking, and if one of them carne iulo a sick room where a man was in bed and be had chills, and was as cold as a wedge, aml she slionid sttnp close to the side of the bed and take hold of his hand, lus (mise would run up to 150, and she would prescribe for a lever when he had chilblains. Oh, ymt can't ft! us on female doctors. A manwho has been sick and had male doctors knows just how much he would teel to have a lemale doctor come trlpping in and throw her fur-lined cloak over a cbair, take oll' her hat and gloves aml throw iIhmu on a lounge, and come up to the bed with a pair of marine-blue eyes, with a twinkle in the corner, and look him in the wild changeable eyes, and ask him to run out his tongue. Suppose he knew bis Eongne as eeated so it looked üke a yellow 'l'urkisb towel, do you suppose he would want to run out over flve or six incbea of the Lowei part of it and let that lemale doctor put her tinger on it to sec how t'urry it was? He would put that tongue up IntO bis check, and wouldu't let her seu it lor -.!." cents admission. We have all seen doctors put tbeir hands ander the bedclothes and feel of a man's feet to see if they were cold. If a female doctor should do that it would give a man cramps iu the A male doctor can put his hand on a man's stomach and liver and lunirs, and ask biin if he leels any pain there, but it'a tanate doctor should do the same thing it wou UI make a man aick, and he would want to net up and kick himself for employfng a teníale doctor. Oh, there is no OM KIlKlllil, II WIIUIU klll I1I1IU. HUW Blipniaii luis heart (ÜMMO, a ml if a fenale doctor shouHl want to listen to the beating of his heart. She would lay lier lei i ear on lus left break, so her tycs and roei Oud niouth would be looking right in lus face, and lier wavy hair would be scatlereii all around there, gettlng taagled In the iiMiions of hla nigbt-ehlrt. Don't you ¦uppose hta heart wond get in abont twemy azora beat to the minst f And she would aiuile - we vvill bet $10 she would sniile - and show her pearly teeth, and tlie rlpe lips would be worklng is thoagb she were oouoting the beata, mul be would think slie tiying to whisper to hiin, and , n'ell, wnat would he be dolns all thistmiev [fhewaa nol deadyet, wnlcli w( ui ld bea wonder hli let't hand would brush the hair away trova bet temple and kind of smv lliere to keep the. away, and his rlght iiauil would xetsort of nervooi and move Hiound to the baek of herhead, and when rtl6 had euunleil 1 he lie:iis a few miliutos and WM raW&g her head.he would draw it up to liim and kis-; lier onee tor luck,.if be was as biliOna as a Jersey swanip angel - and have her charge it in the bül. And then a reactton would set in, and he would e as weak as a cat, and she would have to fan hiui and ruli his head till he got over belng nervotUi and then make out hls preseriplion alui1 tte gOl a-leep. No; all of a nian's gyptODM Dhange wheu a 1'eniak' doctor is practiciOK on hini, and she would


Ann Arbor Courier
Old News