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Bismarck, Pork And Sympathy

Bismarck, Pork And Sympathy image
Parent Issue
Day
5
Month
March
Year
1884
Copyright
Public Domain
OCR Text

Ilnrr L.iaker is dead. Herr Lasker was a Gertnai: statesinan, or sommi i in ur tiw sort. It being a little dangerous to say ruuch about liim, lest Bismarck get mud we append "something of the sort" as a precautionary mensure. Well, when the American Congress iieard that HerrLasker was dead, it set itself to "resoluting." This vice of resolving will be the death of this people yet. The occasion funiished such a capital opportiinity to get in a 3 a of whereasos and resol ves, thatCongi( sí chuckeled over its cold tea.and began to shed ;tears of sympatby, smiling, however through thetearf.Itsympuluzed with Germany- tliere are dead loads of sympathy (or Germany in thiscountrj-, pbout this time- and with Bismarck upon wliose ncck the American nation vvould love to fall in loving posture, there beinj; but one thing else tfiat t would like better and that is that Bisinarck should fall on his own neck. But Congress passed its resolutions of sympathy, baptised them with tears, engrosséd them upon dusky-edged paper, tied them with a black ribbon, enclosed them in a mourning envelope and sent them to Bismarck. I$ut Bismarck was not pininr for sympathy. If the presentation had been a keg of lager beer, harmonious relations between the twu guBl llllieills COU1U I1HVC Ut'eil 111M1 II ¦ tained. But sympathy was too intangible: and American sympathy is too tliin anyhow. Bismarck would have none of it, and be hustled it back "to the house in which it originated" with a veto. It Is the flrst time Ihat i measure of Congress bas been vetoed by a foreign potentate. But the veto carne, and the rneasure cannot be passed over it. So we have a lot of second-hand sympathy on hand, and are unable to decide whtit to do with it. The only practical way that presenta itself of getting rid of it, is to preserve it in alcohol, until somebody in Spain or the Sandwich Islands dies, and tuen take it out and mark on the back of the paper: "There are our feelings in your great bereavement." As to Bismarck, lie gets no more sympathy from this part of the worW.We would notsympatliize with him, if he was dead hiinself. We will just leave him to plod on through the biambles of life, without the least encouragement from our Congress. He mny now stand beside his new made graves and weep till In1 - hl'mi!. Nota wcud of cheer shall come from us. He lias done some pretty mean tilinga by this country, but he never hurt our feflrtng until now. He damaged our pork interests without the least cause, but wecouldforgivehim that. But to refuse our sympathy is unpardonable. We are for war now. Let our mighty army be called from Montana and placed en route for the Rhine. Cali our aavy home, and send it plowing the briny deep, hended for Germany. If we cannot. get it there by water, carry it overland. Bisniarck will laugli himself to deatli a8 soon as he gets his eye on the combined army and navy of the United States, and the world will get rld of hun. Then somebody will throw a tub f lager beer on' our navy and blot that out, and altogether vast good will be done. The whole matter is so ridiculous, so f ar, that it is enough to make a horse laugh. Congress lias no business to pass snch a resolution. Torn Ochiltree ott'ered it, and without any reference to committee, it went through with a rush. It is now discovered that it really was insulting, in some sentiments, to those who did not agree with Herr Lasker. Hut Congress did not sympathize at all. H has no sympathy for anybody, dead or ulive, and altogether the passage of the blll was a great absurdlty. But it was do more absurd than it8 return was. It is charged that Bismarck was drunk. It looks as if all hands were drunk, Congress and Bismarck. Bismarck'. conduct was very boylsh. But they do say that there is a serious side to the matter, that Bismarck s tiying to insult u, and to tinally close his ports against American commeroe. What is the use of acüng so much like a school boy, if that is what he wants ? If he does not want us, let lilm shut the door, and pull In the string. We can stand that sort of thlng as long as lie can. One of his purposes is sald to be to prevent Gerinan immigraiioi). We, of course, sbould regret to have this cut orl' but if with costly living among the people, and hundreds of tliüusanUs deiiring to immigrate together with Russia threatening trouble, Bismarck does not have more on hand to I worry him than a ton of Congressional avmnntbv could we miss our calculations. I

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Subjects
Ann Arbor Courier
Old News