Good Advice From A Humorist

Te youno; men Bob Burdett suya: "You take a basln of water, place your ti 1 1 tc r in t for twenty-five or thirty secoiids, take it out and look ut the hole that is left. The size of that hole representa about the impresión tliut advice iinikrs on a ymmir man'i inind. "Don't depend too inuch on your fainily - the dead part I mean. The world wants live men; it has no use for dead ones. Qucen Victoria can trace lier ancestors back in a direct line to William the Conqufior. If yon cannot get fnrthcr back than your father you are better lï. You f.ither was a better man in hls time than old William. He had better clothes to wear, better lood to at, and was better housed. "If you are a diamond be sure that you will be Cound. Cheek, brass or gall liever get uhead of merit. "1 love a young man who ia straightforward. Ask for what you want. If you want to marry a rich man's daofhtar borrow $500 from him, ask him for it; it amounts to the same thinjf in the end. It is alwa s better to uatonish a man than to bore him. "IJeinember tbat in the morning of life come the hard-workinj? daya. Hard work never killed a man. Ifs fun, recrcalion, relaxation, holidays, that lei II. The fun tliut resulta in a head the next morning n big that a tub could hardly cover it is what kills. Hard work never does. "Those who come after us have to work jut as hard as we do. When I ehovel th snow off uiy sidewalk, if, perchance I take a three-quarter piece off iny neighbor'a walk, f put it back, because if I clul'nt 1 should be doing him au njustice. "Youcan't afford to do anything but what is gootl. You are on dress parade uil the time. Don't bc afraid of pounding persistently atonething. Don't be afraid of beinji called a onu-ldea man or a crank. If you have one idea, you have one more tiian most men have. It takes a suiart man lo be a crank."