-Madame R - , wfio is still a eoquetts in her advaneed maturity, carne to a private evening party; after eleven o'elook. "How late you are, my eharmer ! " said the mistress of tlie htouse to her, reprovingly. "I am quite ashamed," answered Madam E, ; "but my inaid is so very s!ow; she takes Htose than an iiour and a half to do iny hair." '-Fortunatoly," observed ono of hor frieuds, "you. are not obliged to stay at home while she ia doins: it." JCSÊT An Irishman, in describing America, said : " I am told that ye might ro'l Eiiglaud tliro' it an' it wouldn't make a dint in tlie ground ; there'a fresh water oooans insido that yo might dround ould Ireland in ; un' as for Scotland, ye might gtiuk it in a corcer, ye'd niver be ableto fiud It ont exeept it might be by the smell of whisky."