"thpit On It."

A good ftory bas beun told of a lisping offieer in thü army, having been victimized by a brother officer (noted lof his cool deÜ'ueration and his stron-g oerves), and his getting square with him in the follouing manner : The eool joker, the Captain was aUvuys quizzing the üsping officor, a Lip.iiteuant, for his nervousnesa. "Why," suid he, one day, in thepresence of his company, "nervousness is all nonsei.ee : I lell-you, LieutenaDt, no brave man will be nervous. "Well,"' inquired ihe lisping friend, "how would you do, tlipose a shell with ao inch futhee thou'd drop itthelf into a walled angle, in which you had taken thelter from a company of tharp thooterth, Eind where it was thertain, if you put out ynur nose, you'd get peppered.' 'Ho-.v," said the Captain, winfcing at the circle. "why, talia it co. ], and sj it on the ftisee." The party broke up and all -etired, escept the ] Jí-rpl THe nest cnorniog a nuinber of soldierg wcre aseint)led on the parade anfj taHsjogiu plusten, whcn alono; csnie the lisping Jiientenant. Lazily opening hip eyes, he remarkeil : '■I want to iry tin experiment thuh morning, and thee hovv extheedingiy cofl von can be." Saying this, he walked deliberately into the ('aptain'a quarter, wliere a fire wns-' burning on the hesrth, and, plaeing in its hoüent centre a powder canisJeiy ustantlj retreated. Ttiré was hut one mode of egret.s fïom the qiiarters, ond thut was u pon the parade groiind, llie rond beitig built up for de fense. ïhe occupant took ono ook at oanister, comprehended the situötioii, ar:d in a inoa.cnt dashed at ttio door, but it was fa.stened nn the outside. "Charley, let ine out ií' you love me," íbouted the Captain. . "Xh pit on tho canither I" shouted he in return. Not" a moment wns to be lost. He had at fiist cuught ip B blankut to cover his egres; but now; dropping it, he ruised the windpw and out he bounded, sluis culottes, sanK eyerything but a very short under-gumieüi ; and thus, wjth h;iir i!m''st on end, he diished npon a full purado ground. The shout which hailfd him ealled out the hole barraoks to see what was the matter, and the dignitied Captain pulled a Sergeant in front of him to Inde biinse'f. "Whv did'nt yuu thpit on it?"in: quired t he Lieutenant. "Beeauee there ere no febarpshooters iu front to step a retreat," answered the Captain. "All I. gut to iJiiy, then, iïh,'1 said tho Lièutenant, "ihat yfu might thafely have done il ; ior I'll thware there wasn't a tliinglo grain of powder in it.' The Captain has never spoken of fiervousness since.