A Brace Of Protectionists

A story is told that probably illustrctes thïd protectiou business better thao anjtliing eïse Gen. Sobenck's idea of eijualizing protection is to lug ioto the protccted lista as ruucb Western produce as he can. Thi would bc very well f he could only fínd some procesa thereby to enbance tho price of our great staple?, as wheat, corn, bacon, beef, &c. liut as he can not", he goes as far as possible n that dircction, and fierce ou flax, hetnp, and as for jute - be is tremendous on jute. Whilo getting up bis bill and aggravating the real prohibitionisls as mucli as we free traders do - for they pronouuce him eo ignoraut as not to know that real praotioal protection meana cheíip labor and cheap material - I say whilo getting up bis bill, ho callcd upon the Hon. Oakes Ames to help him put up ttio duty on jute. Ames posiiively declined. This Oakes Ames is one of the membors of Congress who votes money direct!y into lus own pockets, for he is at the of ono of the heuviest irou manufactories in the Unitod States. He niakes shovels, and whilo he votes with the otber huDgry houuds for a heavy duty on the manufactured shovel, be keeps down the duty on the raw material, which raw material is sorap iron. "I want you to help me on jute," cried Schcnck. "Now look hero, Schenck," responded Ames, "don't you soa that if you go on protecting everything, you destroy proteotion ?" "No, I don't," responded S. "Well, you just do. We must havo cheap material and cheap labor, and if we don't get these we have no protection. Now you put up material on us, acd you put up labor by adding to tlie cost of living, don't you see ?" "I see," responded tbe chairman of Ways and Means, "that in your selfish greed, protootion is a good thing as long as 3-ou make money by it, and not so good when any one elee has a chance." "But that is not protection ; we want to protoct the manufacturer," roared Ames. "There is no sense in attempting to protect material. It is skillod labor that has to be built up. Now, how could I make tbe Great American Shovel at a profit if scrap iron were put up on me." "You will not help me on jute ?" asked Schenck. "No, I won 't, because" - "You will not ?" "No, I won'tl" "Toen 111 be d d if I don't go for a dnty on scrap iron !" ''Schenck, you're not serious ?" "Never more so, Oaky, in my life ; I am going to stick you on scrap iroa ; so look out for the Great Amerioan Shovell" And suro enough the new bill puts up sorap iron, and the Honorablo Ames is standing on bishead, which, by the by, is about as natural and safe a position as old Shovels could assume.