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The Colored Member

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Tbc olecii'm Wa over in tlie flat, suntruck, dnmb-anguish, oreek-gaahed, bayndented paristi of ADigfttorville, and our ello man and brother l'ompey Iloward ad oarried the day with exaetly tho maority which his backcrs had bet on. It does not require mueh practico with ;ho double-barreled phrases ot' the Engish laaguage to hit the idea tliat our felow-man and brother wus that kind of human oomrade and fraternal relaÜTe which ho Indo-European inhabitants of Alliga orville delighted to honor with tho title f "nigger." In complexión ho favorod tho ace of pades, and was not to bo put to the )lush by the ace of clubs. There was no ïorc prospect of his hair getting out of url than thoro was of its lurninsx iato ■atinis or uoliithread ar pointe appliquée. 'he bridge of his noso was so fir frombong an elcvation, and was on tho contray such an indisputable, monotonous, ndeven grovelinií depTesaLon, that yon ould only oooeider it a bridge by sup)Osing that it hd broken down and gone o ruin. Hislipsprojccted to thatd bat lm might almost liav' used thetn as 'eolers in the dark, or as bulïers to di ftdn a colliison : while it was possible to magiDe a manikin naturalist standing pon them quitu at his en.-", and measurug with polo the breadth of lis nostrils abo. o. His jaws werc so mge, protuberant, and powerful, that a Jarwinian might le excused tor infering.froni liicui that he balonged to n aoe which not very long since got its livng by cracking uocoanuts and manowoneswith it-. teeth. This man and brother liad bren a ave; lie was descended froin uien and jrethron who had for two bundred y ars jent slaves in a land ot' stranger j; he Tas further descended f'rom men and rethren who l'or thousands of years bad con slaves, Bavages, Molator-i, and emnimls on their own native soil. Üiuco the loariest oyele oomoiemorated by history, iiad not been a yoar when somejody was not "gutting alter" these men nd brethren, hunting them for the m ra rtleea pleosure of killing them, and makngtheiu work whon theydidn't want to, nd for perposes which were not to thei TOfit, taking thoir wages out ot' their ïands and thoir bread out of tln-ir mouths, ;attooine their backs with oat-o'-nineails, and their shins with boot-toes, and, n short, giving tbcm a hard, mean, derading hfe of it. Od Egyptian granite, nd in Greek and ltoman marb es and enetian cuiivasses, and in more modern icture-bookï, their woolly hcads and jrognathous jaws anl cucumber shins ïad leen painted and sculptured and printnd in evury attitudo and action exnressive of sulijugation, servility, pol;roonery, helplcsanoss,' and ridiculousI1C6S. At last ft benovolont and sagacious bird called tho American eagle, move-d to ticadiong compassion by a conscience and other circumstances over whioh hu had no control, resolved to repay Pompoy Howard in ono lump for all these insulta and injuries to bimself and his forcfathors. It said tohim in substance : " You never struck a blow for your liberty, and nevertheleaa you .hall havo it. You are as ignorant," as heavy-brained, and as inorally degraded as tho vulgarist pensant of the oldest despotism of Europe ; Doverthnlesa you shall be a citizen oí a great and glorious ropublio, which dependsfor its strength and honor upon the intelligenoe and virtue of its citizens. You never governed even yoursolf, and have not tho slightest knowledge of stateemansbip, nor a conception of right and wrong in politics ; nevertheless I ' instituto you an elector, with the possibility of' buing a juror, a dignitary in the cummonwealth, an exeeulor oi' justice, and a lawgiver." Having decroed this much, this most ingenious and of fowls that roost pn stars, with coats of anus around their necks, sailed oheerfully way f rom tho man and brother, leaving biiu to his own devices. Immediately on tbo departure of the eaglo, or whatover posterity may discover iiim to havo beon, a carpet-bagger sidled up to the new-bom elector, and, with that guileloss urnile which Satan wore when ho blarneyed Kve, whisperod to him : " O, man and brothor, run for lice and support my little bill, ■ and you shall have more mouoy than you can got by hoeing." Accordingly Pompey Howard, with the carpet-bagger's guiding lingera on his uiiccrtain nose, had run with his onoumber logs tor the position ot' representative from Alligrttorvillc, and, tbanks to thu Votes oï other. men and brethxen justas íit tor political power as himself, thanks also to tlie professors of ballot-box legcrdemain who countod tbosu votes, had come out ahcad of all oompetitor The first impulse of the new-fledged logislator was to shake hands with hafi a hundred or so of raggcd adherents, and his next to start tor his cabin, four miles up the spongy and reedy battka of AUiga tor Creek, with a view to rapper. Co the oütakirts ot the orowd of eleotora be met his lath(r, coiuinonly known i'or the last sixty years or so as Únele loby, a whiteheaded, shrnnken, twisted, and wondert'uily wriükled little man and brötKer, füobarely kept himself from dropping upon all tours by holding cm with botli hands to a l"ng stick, and who quently resembled the örang-otftaBg which ono discovers in unbeliovable lustrations of natural histpry. " Hullo, Dudtly ! " shcmted Bapwwntalivc Ilowawl. "Vhi:n; tl y.,u in the votin' V I spectod to sec you tliar a put tin' in your ticVet t'or me." " An'" so I rlid put in," gqueakad l'nclc i Tohy, witli Buch a grin on bis wizened taco as you may see any day through tho bais ot u monkey cage. " I stuck it iu tho hole in the Pcs'-office. Some boys told mo that was tl: o place." "Themboys!" exclaimed the ooloroO raomber indignantly. " Now that ain't fa'r. They just been and come it on the old man. Now that ticket oughter ccun( all tLo -iame." " Certainly, Mr. Howard," put in a smiling, lurking, corpulent gentleman, drossed in frnyedand grensy black hroadcljth umi : dined with supi i u-ly ostentatious ïuwelry, who was no othei than 1 lm advisatory carpot-buggcr, Mr. Jaok Hun:. Mr. Jaok Iíunt, a lato oonvert from New York city democraoy, who had como South to mskeuae of the m!n and brother as the monkey mado use ei' the '■ut, bad no inoro appoaranco of being a born tooi than Pompey Howard had of being a born tvige. líe possessed about. an ounee move of nose, a couplo of pounds moro ot brains, and a pound or BÖ loss of ohopethan thenewly elected lawgiver. in other respecta his appearanoe was not to hia advantage, being obviously that of a sliiuy and impudent scoundrel. "Oertainly that voto raust beootmted," wont on ilr. Jiok llunt, in a lubricating voice, fat and werm t J Hokishness, like machine groase. " We will have it with tho othors and lot it go to help tho good causo. Heavons and earth ! - a vote cást in gooil fidth üku that !- of oourse it will cemnt. Bat allow me to ask, who is your venerable frisad '(" "Who ?- him 'i "grinned Pornpey Howard, wJio had never before heaní his father called venerable friend, nor seon him bowed to by white folks. " That's my ole daddy." " De - light - ed ! " smiled Mr. Hunt, s.'izing and sbaking a withered paw that lookedasifit might have done its chief earthly work in the way ofolimbing trees and hatnging on to branches. "Very glad to meet you, Mr. Howard. I had notioed you before, and wondered who you could be. It gives me great pleasure to l. un that you ure the father of our distinguitihed representativo." Ky way of answer to this speech Unció Toby went off into a series of asthmatio chucklings and Bniggeringg, which ended in such a coughing aud spasmodio wrigging thai it seemed as if he would disgorge.shu.ko out, and give up whatever ghost there inigbt be in the mummy that served him for a bod'-. " Yis, I'm his dadt'y," he said, v.'hon he liad recovered such ift of Bpeeoh as he -i,d, a gift the moro easily lost porhaps becauso hia race had not had it very muy centones, and becanse he had been so unfortunateiy situnted in Ufe as not to uake much intelligent use of it. " J5ut my name ain't Howard," ho added, with another ohuokle, whioh ni evidently too much for a creature in a semi embalmed oondition. "I'se old Toby Beanmont. Baised by de Beaumonts of Hartland, don' ye see y Hoo ! dv was quality. Pomp yere, he was raiaed by de Howards. I'm Beaumont an' hc's IIoward. Üat's de way it is." Then, backing off from Jaok ILmt with Beveral jurohying" bows, Únele Toby fcurned to one of his ancient cronies un mattcrcil soornf ully : " Drtfs ■■ ignorum man. 'Pean iüce Iih don' kaow uothin' rightljr." Obvioníly also ho took next to no inm his son's i'lcciion m representative, and had not the h1h!i that Pompey owed him an atom of filial rever mee. " Come along. Pomp - time tobe gittin' up the Crick," putin Cassar Delftunay, a oulored neighbor of the colored member. "No, no, objpotod Mr. Oarppt-bngger Iluiit, wliohsdhy nom,!is !iis manijmhiiious of Alligatorville'a !' i son. " Don't go botne now, Mr. Howard. Couie along to tho tavern mul take R drink over it. I want to sny something more about that little bilí of mine," ho wlnjered. " Lord bless yon, man, you're a pnbHo character now. Business tirst, and pleasure aftetwarda. Come along." It was notieo'ible that, in tulking to his Teleinachus alone, this carpet bagger Mentor diopped the lnbrioating tone which he used in the hearing of the electors, and astumed an air which was hailfellowih and half dictatorial, not unlike tho menner of a jolly polioonian in communing with a piokpocket. Not a little against his will, ouv ropresonttitivo man and brother followed his benign inflaenoe a bottlo or so of bad Ipirits, said and repeated and swore tiüit hewould infiiilibly vote for his pet enactment, recolved as earne&t of rewards of virtuo to come a üve-dollar greenback, and wn.s put to bed for tho night on a : settee in a state of inimmn! insensibility. Awakening in due time from his slumbor, and tuccessively awakening in due i time from other similar slunibors, he at last awoke on the day when he must join i his brother legislators. Not having done a licK of work since famo had markcd ! liim for her own, and being consequently as destitute of e.ash to travel with as bis old woman and piekaninnics wi ■■ af cash to stay at home with, he was forced to get his hut oheoked through to tho State capital at tho expense of Carpotbagger Hunt, therey putting himself i der ahother obligation to go for that i tleman's littie bill. " But how's I to know when yonr businees is eomin' en?" he inqnired of his banker and adviser, as they suioked together in the second-class car. "Oh, 111 heon liund," promised t!io member of the lobby. "I'llgivo you a poke when it's up. All you'vo got to do is to sing out, Aye." "1 s'pose it's all right, Mr. Hunt?" inqtlired Poirtpey, who judged, from whnt ho had learned of his friend's ways, that there was a " inighty smart chanco " of its being all wrong. ' Right ? Of courso it's right," asseveratod the oarpet-bagging mo, opening his eyes wide with amazemen'. at the qnes tion. " Hain't you had your üve dollars, and more, too ? " " Oh, yis, I've done had it and done spont it," assonted Pomp gloomily. "But wniit 1 moaii is, tuero ain't nothiu' wrong in it - in de bill 't " " Certainly thore ain'f ," declared Jack Huiit, with the glibness whioh ia a wellknown characteristio of' modésty and virtue- -Lonc to thedevil. "There'snothing to get you in jail," he oontinued, noi is the least raapeoting that&nigger oould havo tlio slightest spico ot' consoionce. "Don'tyou be afraid, Pomp. Even if there was anything wronp, It'a none of your bumness. Thut's thn Governor's loolcout. It's his nffiiir to soo what' wrong and to vuto it. " " Veto it V" puz.lud tho lawgivcr. "Yes, veto it; stamp ou it ; that's his little l)i." " Oh, that's his l)iz," anawered Pomp inuoh roliovcd. "Yes. "'"u gopa and vote for what you want; vote i'or nll the party oieasure and all your frienda1 meaaares; vote juét 08 our sefc of tellers toll you. lï nytbing is wrong tho Govornor sèos to it." Thns cilncat.-d lip to tho dut;is and PBpo!iiii!iti(;s ut' mo AmerioM legislator - (■■iKMtiil, we fear, as a gTgat mmibcr of our legislators aro, all over tllis land of Í intclligence and treedon - I'ompey How;ml arnvi il at the capital of the State he had servad and honored. Mr. Jauk Hunt, or rathor, wa raight appropriatfily say. Mr. lU-clzebub Hunt, took lodgingsfor his Ami damni in n painted plice of a wooden house which looked as if it had been shaved off iïom eome largar building, and which had been out so inconvenitjntly thin that the stairs leading to the second story were necessarily on the outside. Imagination could not picture a stairoase in tliat repicsentative mansión without also picturing its rooms aa being liung out of the wiudows liko bird-cages. The apartmnnt alloUed to tho meraber frotn Alligatorville had no lock on the door, as bi'ing jast the réndenos fot a legislator whose breoohos pockcts were no tomptation to siieuk thieves, and whose b&ggage went into a ootton hundkeruhicf without orowding. It had no blinda to its singlo window, whioh in faut admittod 80 little light as not to necd thosti obstruetions, liaving boen made appurcntly for one of the palaees of Lilliput. lts Hoor was just as naked as il )iad been bom, poasessing not even a fig-leaf oí' a rug to liido ite indecency. ïlio only nriiclcs of furnitnre were a oot-bed, a piue wiisli-stand, a r cking with a crick in the back, and & teven-by-nine lookingglass which made Pompey's face twice as broad as it was long. Yt such had been the hnniility of his previous bélongings, and so magnifloently did this wretcl e i i'i'll compare with liis rotten log calin on Alligator Creek, th;tt it seemed to liiui u if he wore enti,r!ng into tho abodes of luxuryi "ïliere jon aro !" BBÏd Jack Hunt, grinning at tlie lawgiver'a obvioua uwe of tho neuralgic rocking-cjiair ; "I go BMurity for you, and you eettle out ol your salary, whon you get it. The rooul on the front is the den of Father Abel. Know the old cock ? " Pompey, with some vagno idea tliat he was in paradisaical Boenes, and tliat Adam and Ee, and pérhape ft'i nigel or so, would saon appoar to hiiu, "illowed" ;hat he did not knowFatlusr Abel. "'Daddy Abel,' they generally cali üd," explained Jack Bont. "Hu'sono of your big guns ainong do oallad breddren," hecontinued with a iiowei'y imi;atio:i of the negro dii lect. " Yonïl buck igaintt him some ranrniug, and you'd letter ootton him. He's one of ray paricular bummera, aim jio won't let the silver grays pull tlie wool over your inv. íiesides, he'll show you the way to take he gospel ship aml sail for the port of' Zioii," Iih ftdded, with a chuckle, as f the voyago in question were the most ridicuous íhing imaginable. " Now, to oome )ack to business, you'll want soine money 'or your feed, and 111 put up ten dollars aore on you, and you can pay me when rou oan. That niakos fit'ty so far, rlon't t? To-morrow night 111 light on yon and tike you to the Governor's reception. ï. gires a big blow-óut fot tho memoere. Uh, don't look staied. It's a i'roe lunch '.r all, white, and colored, and semi-coluvd, and demi-semi-colored ; and all you've got to do thero is to do jast what rou waai to do, "at, drink, sinrtke, and be on fhc 1 d es. The Öovernor pays, and tho Becrtt service t'und puya tho OJovornor, and overybody that votes is welo all he can use." With these inntructions and encouragenouU, exit Jack Runt, whistling ".Tordun ain a hard road to trabble, 1 believe." Djiiui; the next twonty-four hours Pump I ;.' 'sriahed . hinrseri nomically i n oom bread and oommon !oi ïgs having aa idea that borrow'iig of nis enrpet-bïitriri'ifi Pythias was as expensive mvde of getting a living, and bolieving that the lit'ty dollars so jauntily oiphered ap against him siould really be soinewhere about thirty, though the whole fmancial rauddle wasmuoh beyond -,ili in arithmeiie. ciid nut enc, luntor DaddyAbel, though in hissloneliiiess be waited tor hini long in the dark baro hali of the little housn, and once niustered courage to tap softljr at his unpattitod and badiy bruisod door. Much of lus time he passed in wandeling up and down the streets, like a dog who bas Int his mastor, or in staring in at the doOrs ot''il liuttls whioh he lid mt to enter. He would have been oveijoyed to meet Jack Hunt, oven though that individual had charged him flve dollars for the privilege and oalled it ten. If he had knovm Huw to writn, he would havo written to his wife ; and if he oould have found a prayer-Qieetíng, he would have gone in and had a nap. But duving thn secon-1. evoning of this wearisome leisure and grandeur, just as ttiis dusky Faust had decided thit the joys of olHoe were not comparable to hunting 'posstmu or even hoeing swoot putatoes, lie was olieerod by tlie arrival of his Lobbying Sfophistophelas. " Come along," said Jack Hunt : " it's nine o'clock, and the (iovernor has grisi i up.' Pompey, who was getting to bed on tho Bupposition thatnothing jovia I oonld hapIjyii that night, imtnediately tore on his uoat arxt boots again, and hurriod at'ter bib friend to the gubernatorial mansión, fearf'ul of getting thcre too lato. What with walking at tiic rate ot'four miles an hour, and speoulatinir the nugustand iiliirming niystery to como at the rate of a thousand miles a minute, he whs absolutuly breathlees ashe ascended theliroui gnttnte steps and pansed before thé gfeut oiiken door. He was more terrified at t lic idea of entering that palaoe of lights and luxury than he would have been at the prospoct of going to jail ; and when a spracely-dri ■ d mulatto waiter showed him in and tw.ik his httt, lie was in a state to offer to brush that ooudfieoending creature's boots. Glancing down the wide imil and into the spaoious parlora he was not so much rolicved as atn it6& at discovering dozons and scores, and it seemed to him, of colored peopid, sumo of them as tinely attired as the b.ouse-servants whom lie had been acQUstomed to see at the doors of th wliifo qnálity, and others as rough and unoottth and boorish as himself, but all upparontly quite at home. " Why I they8 niggers hcre," ho exolaimed, in his hand astonishmont. "Of oouree," laughod Jack Hunt. " Dldll't I teil you so 'I " " Yes, íallow yon tole rao so," admitted Pompey. " But I didn't think it was so, suru.'' " Come along," said the carpot-laggor. " Hure's your chuiu, and 111 introduce you." They approached a tall, elderly negro, so gaunt in figure, and with such a smali head, and so sombrely and glossily ciad in shining black bombazine, that he put i'ompey in mind cf a turkey-buzzard, more éspeóially as ho walked with alimp. " Patnei Abel, hold on," observed Jack, slapping the back of the bombazine coat. " This is Pomp Howard, the member froin Alligatorville. You are chums in the same house and ought to bo thick with eaoh other. lie's my own man, is Soward ; 1 put bim in and bet on him." "I deasay yon has good reason to, Mr. Ilunt," responded Fathei Abel, inspoctiug l'omp's exterior with a dubitating though ho had seen better, and Uien again Been worse. "lam exceedingly glad to welkim him hare, an' hopea for the pleasure of his furthur acquaiutance. Andifhe heis tarryin' in tho same edifloe v:t!i me, 1 shall be happy to have liini in to prayere of an evenih', an', for that matter, you too, sir." ' Oh, he'll come and tako a front soat," guffawed the lobbyist, in a Btyle which i:i'ni0to that tiio prayera wen a good Jökeon Bepresentttdre iloward, but not a ploasantry with which ho proposod to bardan hi own attention. " Andnow, Daddy Abel," ho oontiiiued, drawing tho reverend gentleman a?ide, " how about that little bill of min;? What's to bc put into the hot for going for it? Come, now, don't bo too hci'ty on me. Mr. Abel." " You knows, Mr. Hunt, that I never fakes mything formyself," returned Daddy Abel, in an unctuous whisper which was not meantfor Pompey Iloward's ears, but wbich did nevertheless stumblo into tbem, they being of unusual lengtli and othur dimcnsious. " Oh, I know your style," grumbled the carpefr-bagging innocent, in a tone which hinted very plainly, I wiali I didn't. "Butthey'sa littlespeokof ainortgn.ffo on my sanotuary whicn weighs mightily on niy poo' llock, an' whioh I'd liko for to git lifted." " Is it the mortgago that I lifted last scssion '"' demanded Jack Ilunt, with a look of profound disgust. "Xii - he - hél rathor awkwardlv ohnokled Daddy Abel. "That is," he poTBued, resuming hits turkey-buzzardsolemnity, "it.-; the same ilo o' nioney," ' W hy, tbat's anotbër five hundreddollars," exclaimed Jack. " Confound it, I'd muoh rathersettle sqoftrely with yvu than have you come t.his eccleSÜMltibai on me with your blasted old meetinghouse niortgiige. Come, now, Pather Abel, T oftn't stand it. The hand of the Lord ia altogèther toó heavy cm me." '■ 1 has my own idees of what's right an' decent," responded Daddy Abel in a stub.born, meek voiue. "I hasacharacter to uphold, j'ou mus' remember. l!tsides, they's heaps o' money in thi.s railroading business o' yourn. Some folks tella me they's as much as amillion init." "There ain't," almost roared and altogether lied Jack Hunt "There ain't ten thousand in it, nor live thonsand. SVell, come, now, how many can you ropo in 'i How many votos 't " " I think about twenty of tbebrethiing wou'd follow my lead," muttered Daddy Abel. " Well, go it, fhen," grant1d the earpotbagger. " 111 let you have the five hundred. fiivo you a check as soon as the bilí comes up." As one result of this conversati 3n, Pompey Howard decided tbat the five dollars which had been advanced to secure bis own voto during the entire session must be conaidered i -ury incomplete reward of virtue. He had not mustêred courage, liowiver, to state this conclusión to Mr. Hunt beforo the latter grappled hiin by the elbow witk his usual " Como along " By this time the meinbor from Alligatorville was a little more at easo than when he first entered upon the plendors and marvel of the gabamatoriai mansion. Nevartholesg, the spectacie around !?iiu made him open his eyes as wido tts if he were gazing upon the objects and perBonages of fairyland. If all the colored people present had put on white robes and gom; up througu the ceiling in charlire, they OOttld not havo amazed him moro than they did by the free-andeasy Bfcyle in whioh they conduoted themselyea in this palace, and the hail-fellowwell-met air with which they treated white folks. Brtw one negro whistling ; anolher making oertain jovial movements with rt to .start oiTin a dance; another stretched at full length along a sofa, with his boots on the silk damask. There wero negro gentil walking arm in arm with white ladies, and negro ladies chatting gayly with white gentlemen. "It'sa rum sight, ain't it?" smirlted Jack Hunt. " And the people are as rum as the sight. See that stift'-looking chap, with a long yellow moustache, talking to that milk-iind-inolnsses gal over thero by the piano? He's just been purdoned out of State i)rison for oheating the intornal revenue. That tall bummer, with long black huir and a broken nose, is a professional sport. The little chnokfe-headi ñ tel lev who looks so drunk was sent uplast Bpring for Beven years, but got off for reasons óf State. Somo of 'em are such, and some of 'em are better, and some of 'em are worse. Don't you trust auy of the crowd unloss I teil you to. You stick to line an.l Daddy Abel, or you'll get the strap game played on you, and never see the iir.-it dollar tor your vote." I iatening to .sueh-like gracious tidtnga and warninga, so well oaloulated to make a new-hatohed tegislator a blossing and an ornament to his country, and sidling mennwliilo through the oddly-assorted crowd with the air of a mortal walking among elfs and trolls, Tompcy oame to a side mom, the sight of which eheerod hiin likethe sig'nt of a corner grooery. Thore was a long tttble set with glases, bottles, and boxes of cigars, tho bottlos being of the rhanipaKiiesoit and the cigars .Hilvanas. liehind the tablo were two dandified oolored gentlemen, who vraited oti i horde of moiubers and lobliyists in front of it. Everybody drank and everybody amoked, and everybody drank and smohed all he wanted to. Pompey saw one man and brother take a oigar, li;lit it, lounge about the room with his hands behind him, approaoh the table Hgiiin, lean against it in a guileless way, run a biir tist into ne of tlie boxes, take out a gitebof eigüi-s, slick them into his ooat-ttcil pocket, an 1 rerame his sanateralg. Cretohing thoeyoof thisself-helpful feilow-creature, Pompey could uot help going off in a spasmodic snigger, whereupon the fellow cnsilmv also sniggered in a shamefaoed fashiou, and then recovering his self-possession winked knowingly. " Walk up and fill up," Baid Mentor Ilunt, pouring out ohampftgne for his Telemachus, and taking a goblet of it. " Everything is free, and tho Governor pays, and the State pays him." Pompey had never before drunk champagne, but hü lifelong Btudies in whisky enabled him to master tho secret at the lirst jump, and ho irretrievably damaged a quart bottle of Mumm's Imperial. The result that he scon beoame suoh a cheerful man and brother that if all the other inhabitants of this footBtoól had been in the saine condition it would have been the iolüest footstool under tho canopy. He had some such exhilarating sensations as if evory curl in his wool w jewsharp, and all these jewsharps wero combiued in an orchestra which played Rimultaneously evory jig in croation. Tbings went on in his brain in a crossover-and-down-tho-middlo stylo, ns if it were the dance-room of asttilorboardinghouse, and the crew of a frigate had just boen paid off in the neighborhood. Jlis tongue was loosed, like that of Balaam's ass, and he taUted as glibly as that quadruped, thotfgh tess wisely. Ee whistled, and showed ofï a st.p ar two of his Lavorite breakdown, and slapped porfectly unknown lawgivers on the shoulder, and laoghod like geren thunders uttering their voices. At last his two million or so of jewsrevealedto him a message to the effect that he oughtto walk with a white Lady. The Speaker'g wife was that even ing (Uiting mispellaneously with the oploréd memoers, for the sake of securing her husband's re-eleotion to tiis honorable and lucra tive position. Bo for half a minuto Pompey Howard promenaded ig the stars' with the white kid glove of a goddess of fashion just touching the sleeve of his slop-sho]) c.iat. " Have you been preaeirted to the Governor?" asked the Speaker's wife, who had sorrowfully aoquired a knack of ting rid of people, and who was determined to get rid of the mernber t'roiu Alligatorville, it she had to push hiin out of a window. " No. Whar is ho ? " answored Fompey, falling into tho trap, tbough ho wantod to waík more with the white lady. So the Speaker' wifo introduced him to the Governor, who shook hands with liini and bearued on hiin as if lie loved hiin, and tlion as quick as lightning introduoed him to a particular friend of bis, whose bunnen it wet to toto off colored membors and dunip them at a distance, as if they won; bo niany loads of garbage. Just as Pompey found himself dumped, the loors ot' tho supper-rooin were throwa open. lmmediatoly thero was sunh a nish as there usud to be into the dining halls of American hotels, ín the good oíd times wlic.n the gentlemanly propriotor always j-'-t half a dozsn ohaixs less thun wore necossary to Beat liis guests. The wliito memoen umi the eoloredall ran andrampagod togother, as if it were understood that the deyil had a claim on tho hindmogt. It wasliko a dam breaking away, and carrying with it an ico fiood. Xhe supper-room was packed before tho fitst man could swallow a pickled oyster, and tin: crush, parüoularly around thw tables, wasonough to make dough ot a rhinoceros. ïivery lawgiver took his brother by tin.! collar, and trirust hiselbow under his fifth ril), and did for him. Thun caiiie siich a laying on of hands and sueh a devouring, as if all tho hungry giants of nursery rhynie had been let loose on His Excolloncy's fecd. Honorable gentlemen ladlod up jellies and raked in cakes and orange.s, as if they were spading rice-swamp mud or honing sweet potatoes. Ice-cream went like the snowiiako on the river, a moment white, then gono fon-ver. Saucera of floating-island struggled to and fro in the air, thejr contenta slopping over heads and eoat-collars and coat-tails and iuto slee ves, au the sacred oil ran down Aaron's beard and vestments. One whito dignitary had just filled a píate with luxuriog fov his wife wlicn a dusky hand of destiny descended upon it likt: a hawk npon a June-bug, and removed it from his wondoring sight. It was considerad a good joke by somü legislators (no doubt as boing tymbolical uf tho way things went in politics) to abstract the bananas from dishes which other legislators were bearing away. The Btateainan who liad made a levy on the eigar-uox was justly punished for hÍ3 malversation by losing a whole basketful of sugar-plums, over wuioh liis mouth was already watering. Into this mélée Pompey Howarcl plunged with the comniingled joy of a strong man who knows his strength, and of a liungiy man who seos his supper. Moro tlütn one Caucasian corn had reason to rue tho hour when it made acquaiutanee with the weighty and widesïuiid hoof of the member froui Alligatorville. It was an unexpectsd opportunit}', but ono perfectly adaptcd to his powers of avenging the wrongs and scorns of oentnries. tn a general way colorad mtisclo was tr'.umphant in tho combat, easily biinging Iiulolíuropean muselo to grief, and' thereby iiourisliing itself with great liberality, though at an expense of inuch china. Pompo}', for instance, smasRèd two p and a goblet in tho pröcess of devouring a peck of goodies and drinkiug half a bottle of champagne Of course, when oonvewation recommenced ftfter Bupper, lic could take very little intelligent account of it, owing to his private orchestra of jewsharpgi He did, b o we ver, sucoeed in making out that somo of his brothor Solons were absurdly iudignimr b(H3aose ciirtainnewspapersliail oharged tho Legislatura with ( orrupiion. ■ What's that ary" asked Ponruey, breaking into the ring of talken. " IJoes the papers say we sto'e'r"' "That'swhat Éheysays," returned Dnddy Abal spunkily, for ho was a littlo ;nixïou about his movtgago. " They'ro as rampant as Lucifer." "Well, what ef they does?" ihouted Pomp, clicered to dtfiince by a tl.oisanl or so jigs in hrs hair. " lts limo to srcal. I nevur stole yet - 'coptin a chicken or two now and" then- but I mear 8 to. White folks has been stealiu' from me an' from all the rest of us ever since we was bawn. lías we ever got anything we ever worked for? No, we basn't. White folks stole allvo 'arned, an' paid U4 in lickin's. Now it's my chanco to steal from thom, an' I'm jost a gwine to -do it, you bet yer money." " Come, come, Brother Tloward," expostulated Daddy Abel. "This kind o' talk won't do in public. It liurts tho oanse." " You let mn alotte," vrprindcd Poinpcy, jorking away from tha reverend buzzard and glaring at liim with anoddkiml of honest mdignation. " You'a had five hundred dollars, an' you's gwine to git it ag'in. I hain't had but five, an' I won't stan' it. I wants five hundred dollars for my vote, too. Where's Jack Hunty UI', hei e you is. Now you hear me f You give me fivo hundred dollars, or 111 go back on you. They 's a million in your bill ; 1 heored Daddy Abel .sáy so. You jrss give me a paper for fivo hundred dol[ars; you jess give it to me right yere, whar you stan', or else you shan't havo my ticket. That's 80." " Oh, yonshut up," returned Jack Hunt, with tho eoolness of the wicked. " Ton've had too much champagne, r.nd don't kiiow what j'ou'ro talking. about." " Y: s, I dooe know tui." insisted Poirpej', his orcuestrá playing higber ai d higher. "Toujesatell me right aguar off' what ypu's gwinq to do. You give me :i paper, or ybii doesn't git my ticket." " Wen, comè long, then," said thè oékpet-bagger, bcooming thoroughly nu;:ry with tiiis apoil-sport, but isely iniünt; lus wrath. " Come into a corner with m.. and !''!'■ armngo mattert.'1 Once out of tho crowd, and bcyoml the hearing of indiscreet legislators, J.ick Hunt opennd savagely ou tho membur from Alligatorviile. " Got mt of this," he hissed. " You'vo blows off stoam enough. You are a blat-ted fooi, and can't be trusted. If you had fihown an atom of sonso or principie (!) you could have kopt your se ut, and made a pile out of it. Xow you've lost it. Tho other man claims it, and h 's brought his claim up horo, and 1 shall b:ir,k liim. Your eleotion waant worth a cuss, mul Í can provo it " And provo it he did. Jack Hunt and his inspectors of eloction could luivo shown any result, in tho way of a voice of tho pooplo, that they ploased. They could have made an exhibit of three hundred inajority for St. Geortjo, or three hundred majorit y for tho Dragon, with eqnal eafsp. Nothing was evor moro liko the little joker, or the pea under the thimblo, than the electoral voto of American i'roemen in the ballot-box of Alligatorville. For tho working uf mirados that sacred palladium of rights and Hberties beat tho wands of Kgytian onc.hanters, and put. eomplotfily in tho shnd the best praying machine in Thibet, The samo bits of paper which lind oountod in Pompey Tloward now ciuntcd in his Caucasian and Conservativo rival, doing both jobs with exactly similar facilitv. It tho smoolhest possible game of " Now you seo it, gentlomon, and now you 1 i 't ' 'rriio rosuH of this eg rdomain was that Pomp Howard piökfid op a teinporary living by cleaning boots aroundthe Capitol (furnishingvthereby an awful ing to honorable members who had il iit their hearts to rebel against the lobby;, and OTentually retirnfl froin public lifeby foötiiig it back to Allitratorville.


Old News
Michigan Argus