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The Election Bummer

The Election Bummer image
Parent Issue
Public Domain
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A week or two since a JN egro ín JjOuisvillo named Cburchill Thomas was taken before the City Court on the charge of obtnining money under false pretenses, representing hiniself as the " agent " of candidatos. Mr. Robert F. Baird, acting as assistant Prosecuting Attorney in the case, made a speech in which the following rasping rhetoric occurs: But one word more to the candidates, and I have done. I want to set a mark on the bummer, so that the inexperienced candidates may know him. You have seen the turkey buzzard soaring aloft in the high empyrean ; his broad vans outspread ; he lolls at ease on the fleecy air lie makes no effort ; he is motionless ; he seems asleep. But that buzzard is tot asleep. He is endowed with most extraordinary visión. His eyes penétrate the distance of full 20 miles. He sees every living thing within that vast circumference. He watches with intense eagerness every quadruped that walks the earth. If one drops dead, instantly, from his aerial throne, he swoops down upon it, and begins his carnival by picking out the eyes of the victim. So with the election fiend. You can see him standing on the street, his back leaning against the wall of some building, his cap pulled down over his eyes. There he stands listless, motionless, speechless. You think he is asleep. But that fellow is wide awake. He has seen you afar off. As you approach him he straightens up, takes his hands out of his breeches pockets, puts a new coat of mail on his countenance, and " goes for you." He begins by telling you of his wonder working influence at elections. He tells you he can carry Snaketown ; that he was bom and raised there, and that he knows every man, woman and child in the place. He pretends to have a shop in Pisinire, and he boasts that he can carry Pismire before breakfast. He is glib of tongue. All the " flash phrases," with an abundance of profanity and vulgarity, are on his tongup's end. He is quite comely. In til the houses of bad fame he is a welcome guest. His lodging costs him never a cent. He Í8 heü's pet. Candidates, beware of him. There is viliainy enough in every cubioinch of his bodily frame to bait an hundred mantraps. He wants your money. The man who tries to rob you of your money does not want you to win. If he desired your suo oess, he would rather spend his own money for you than rob you of yurs. Beware of this man - I adjure you, beware of him. I appeal to the Chief of Pólice to issue :he proper orders for the arrest of these vagrants ; I appeal to the 200 policemen whose duty it is duty to guard the city against malefactors, and whose pride it is ;o discharge that duty faithfully, to arrest them and bring thein to justice, aud [ appeal to your Honor to do your duty. And knowing you as I do know you, I tnow that you are not afraid to discharge ;hat duty.


Old News
Michigan Argus