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The Trapper's Opinion Of Affairs In The "states."

The Trapper's Opinion Of Affairs In The "states." image
Parent Issue
Day
3
Month
March
Year
1876
Copyright
Public Domain
OCR Text

"Wbat? no! it can't be posBible I Wal, durn my ornery skin Ef hyar aiu't old Sam Allison back from the States agin. When did ye strike the hills again ? Yer lookin jist os gay An' full of nat'ral cussedness as when ye went I away. ! Yes, it's Sam, as pureas shootiii'. "Put 'er thar," ye durned old coon. I hevn't feit so good fur years. Why, man, I'd jist as soon Hev thought o' scein' my dad out hyar ; I would, I swar to Joe - An' he tuk sick an' " crossed the range " more'n f orty yeara ago. Les see. It war in '71 when you left ns up the creek ; Dr war it '7'2 ? ]My mem'ry isn't nigh so qnick As 'twar a dozen ycars ago. I'm gittin oM, ye see ; I Ain't half the man I war the day we Btrnck tbc . Wal, wint e bin a doin ? an whar all hev ye bin ? An' ivhat 'n the name o' goodness ever brought ye back agin ? Black Hitls, eh ? Goin' to try yer hand at diggin' j arter gold ? Durned ef I wouldn't foller 50 ef I want so tamal old. But I'll hang on to the traps, I guess, fur I hevn't long ter stay Out o' the ground ; an' all I need's my grub from day to dav. Won't hanker arter riches, fur I b'lieve it'd be wrong; I'll jift jog on an' thank the Lord fur leavin' me hyar so long. An' how are mutters in tko States? I hear somo tough old tales Alxmtthegoin's on back thar; 111 swar it knocked the scales A boomin' olï'n my eyes to hear the folks a comis'in An' tcllin' of frauds au' wickedness thet 'ud doublé discount sin. How they manyfactur whisky unbeknown to Uncle Sam, An' bank cashiers keep skippin out. Why, pardy, I'U be dam Ef 'üsn"t hard ter swaller all the stories thet we hoar. They even say the preachers thar are actin mighty queer. Especially sorae high toned ducks, who ireach an' sing an' shout, Then play right inter Satan's hand as Boon as in 's out. Somf on 'em's Ohristians, thet I know ; but then, I I am inclined Ter think thar's lots o' preachm' now-a-days thet's all a blind Ter hido the outsidc skirnüshin'; fur I'm a tarnal liar Ef I don't think with all thet smoke thar's bound ter , be eome flre. They teil me, too, thar's murdcr goin' on 'mongst high an' low, An' they allers find the murdcrers insane an' let 'em go. Pcnitentiaries don't ketch 'em, an' hangin's most ! played out. Why, dog my buttons, Sam ! it's 'miñ to njake the dovil shout ! Ef things keep on a gittin' worsc at this alannin' rate, They'll stick a notiee sayin' " closed " up over ] en'B gate ; Fur it'll never pay expenses to run tho place, thet's I clear. They wouldn't ketch an average of one good saint a year. It makes me sick. I'm tryin' to think thet it isn't truc. Wal, by the jumpin' Judas! what are wo comin'to? I tellye, Sam, I'm glad thet I atn't in thet country now; I'U take these mountains ev'ry time in mine, I will, I vow. Thar's no use tryin' to dodge it, pard ; ome day tbar'll come a crash, An' the wholc infernal country'll go right plum ter smash. ' Fur the Boes thet rules us all, up thar in Heaven's , thiny land, Ain't goin' ter stand no sich a gime 'thout callin' fur 1 a hand. An' I'll bet my wholo last season'a "ketch " thet ef He sets in the game, He'll flll thet briniEtone country up as long as thar's a ñame. Wall, I must. be a toddlin' back ; l've got my pelts all sold. Ain't done so good this year as last, it's been soorful cold Thet I couldn't git ter all my traps ter tend 'em as I'd ought; But theu, I won't complaiu, but thank tho Lord fur what l've got. "Put 'er tbar" agin, old chum, an' I hopo ye'll hev Kood luck But ei the don't pan out jist right an' ye happen to git sturk. Jist con:e to old Jack's cabin, an' ye'll find a place ter stop Long as ye live. Bye, bye, old pard. No, thankee, not a drop."

Article

Subjects
Old News
Michigan Argus