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Grade
7

Why Lemons Are Green

Quincy was a sour patch kid. He liked green kids. He was a purple kid. No one likes purple kids. Then one day he ate a dragon. He loves dragons. They taste so good. They are spicy and hot. Then he felt tingly and pooped out Santa Claus. For Christmas Santa gave me David the Dinosaur. David the Dinosaur was walking down the streets of 90%fromthemothersville when he met a duck that eats exactly 6.75321691841 bananas every day. Then Chuck Norris ate a hippo burger. So the computer blew up and the red jacket turned green, and suddenly the playground broke and the duck had to eat apples again. So then words came off the wall and ate Vincent Van Gogh’s other ear. David the Dinosaur had a brother called Andy the dino. Andy was the most fierce dino of them all. He loved mac & cheese with syrup. One day he was eating a duck when a giant Robbie came flying out of the sky. He landed on a pole and died. Then turned into Patrick. Patrick became good bros with Will. Will liked Wallapuses. Wallapuses are fat. So is Will. Broccoli is just a metal box. Books are scorpian lovers. Then the three priests ate the pillow ranch so there were no more holes in the evil kitten, even though we’ve been trying to kill him for years. Wallapuses are fat. So is Will. But Super Saiyan Quincy realized that Riley could eat the Wallapuses broccoli because Nike is better than wood. But then the cat stole Chuck Norris’s sacred hippo burger. That hippo happened to be killed by Slithering Sam. Slithering Sam was as tall as a green bean and loved cliff jumping. One day he fell over and turned into a snake. That is why nobody drinks lemonade. Tanisha Talin heard the news and spit out his wine flavored lemonade. Tanisha is a newly discovered animal. Here is the description: Talin. Tanisha Talin was walking around town when he saw some people doing magic tricks. He was so high, the trash can turned into a Corvette, he tried to drive it so he suffocated, but he didn’t die because the trash can was filled with Cheez-Its. But then he died because he was so high. Tanisha Talin’s highness transferred to Ethan. It all started when Ethan ate Will Barhushka. It was amazing to see, then it became a tradition every year. There was like fourteen kids every year who went and got like stuff, dude. One of those kids was Riley the Raptor. Riley was fast because he was a raptor. Raptors are fast. So was Riley. There were holes in the book so the sled was like derka-derka. The the yellow ones ate the green bouncy ball, which made raptors go slow again. Riley was special so he also went slow. Then the chicken soup got all yucky and the chord was actually a beach ball. And that is why paper has blue lines. Paper is strong. So is Queen Quincy. Queen Quincy was the mightiest asparagus around. He always showered in the sink and people were jealous. Then a rock came falling out of the sky. It hit him on the foot, Booty Ben took over the land of lands. About a week before this happened, Kim Jong Un ruled the land of lands. “Lolahimakuchakaflak!” Said Kim Jung Un. But he was bad at speaking so it turned into “Hachuka-ma-Fluka”. That round 1 foot 7 guy also had teeth problems. So Nike offered to sponsor him. He said if they could say “Hachuka-ma-Fluka” then he would say yes, but the Nike guy couldn’t say it because he wasn’t Kim Jong Un. Then the broccoli jumped off Kim Jong Un’s plate and said “Lolahimakuchakaflak!” So then Kim Jong Un got his powers back. But then he exploded because all those powers couldn't fit in a 1 foot 7 body. Then his powers were sucked up by Baloney Ben. “Yum,” Baloney Ben said. Nothing better than a good old slap of baloney. His Uncle would always make it for him with some eggo and a cherry on top. Then he turned into a fish and got a pet dog who loved m&m’s. And that is why m&m’s taste like yogurt.  Rambunkshus Robbie hates yogurt.  Rambunkshus Robbie is also a talented hockey coach. He loved cinnamon and had 2 boxes of cereal a day. His schedule was wake up, eat cinnamon, yell at 6 year olds in hockey games. One day he did a backflip. Then he hit Bad Boy Brady with a frontflip. It really hurt. He vandalized yo mamas house in a blue orange pink ferrari. Nobody is sure what color it really is. His appearance in clash of the titans was when he hit the kraken with a straw and then killed a snake. He slurps bug juice like there is no tomorrow. His two inspirations are wackamole Wendy and weasle Webber. “Be on yo toes boy, I’m a get your mama’s TV and CPU. Bunny CPU that is. My shoes are half bunny. That’s why I have give back time. Chovy chof chof woman. But a little Backpack sweat juice solved all my problems, now no one will even come near me. So the pickle at gingerbread and it was good. But hamster pencils are actually buttons. They clip on velcro and eat away at little birdy tattoos. Quincy’s birdy tattoos. Quincy was sad one day. Then the tooth fairy came and kidnapped him. He was taken to teeth headquarters.  Then they gave him a sick dew, then cut it all off. Then returned him back to candy land. Malcolm owned candy land. It was illegal. Then Malcolm had a mug shot. He does coke. Coca cola that is. “What’s the bruise on Mama’s head all about?” he also said, “I like these photo shoots.” also, “After my mama called, I ran 0.0385 miles.” “I Also like the feel of the handcuffs. Jacquelyn Mitchard is the name. 100% skill, 20% dumb, 130% reason to remember the name. Adidas boyyyyeeee.” He said. The sun is Adidas. One night the sun was a pillow chair. LOITA-HEEEEEEE!!! Then the basil jumped out of the pink metal wood box that was white. Then Andy was like Derka-Derka LOITA-HEEEEEE!!! LOITA-HEEEEEE is and ancient word in Australian and British and English, but Riley couldn’t say it because he only speaks American. Eagles, bacon, monster  trucks, soda, hockey, football, basketball, obese people, mostly obese Andy’s. Andy was related to Wendy. Wackamole Wendy loved to make origami and to play wackamole. Every day she would give 1097 concussions to those poor moles.  Soon enough there was no more moles, only freckles. Philbirk had lots of freckles. Once Philbirk ran into a wall. He was in the Hessian regiment in the Civil War. Abu Dhabi is his home. Nike swag China king coney burger with garlic sizzled spring onions. And Oregano leaves. He is a pure fan of Dean Myers, and JESUS. Ben was Jesus’s best friend. Ben had lots of pimples. You could even say he was, pimpin’. So Logan got jealous because his skateboarding pet grapefruit cabinet had always snowed pimples. That motivation made him squeeze out his face constipation so then Mitt Romney got arm hair. Then Baracco Barner said “Eat a Nike gerbil melon Sasquatch!” Then Logan stole Obamas pimples and they had a cool car chase. But then halfway through Jose Mourinho licked his ice cream. Then the cars crashed. So David the Dinosaur became a ping pong champion and Earla El Mighty became president. Then he dropped his ice cream. Wendy’s, are you in good hands? Arby’s was advertising for Jared. Jared was a big boy. He worked at taco bell. Then god at two socks and turned into a duck. He was a special pig. One day Magic Jordan fell from the ground, now he is in heaven. Then dracula fell in love with Peter Pan. Aloha my friends! Then Peter Pan gave Juan a Dave. Juan likes Dave. Then Jack and Jill ate King kong. Ghost peppers are smart. One day Elvis Parsley fell of of a refrigerator. Then the nile river turned into an orange, and pink water flooded Egypt. That is why we brush our toenails every night. Laqueesha...

Cows eat cheeseburgers and kill cannibals. And cannibals drink pickle juice. Pickle juice is JESUS. Then Rachet Susan vomited out my dad. Now chicken meat is white. They eat hamster feet on Fridays. Then Flo from progressive ate thirty oranges. But Super Mario ate them first. Super Mario was Huge. He weighed 437 pounds. It wasn't because he was round, it was because he was the tallest piece of broccoli in the whole city of Europe. He loved ham, bacon, and pork, but hated the taste of pig. One day he was swimming, when he got strangled by sauerkraut. But Mario is Super Mario which means nothing so he died. The Derka-Derka Dance off didn’t die though. The Derka-Derka Dance off was the party of the hour. No one was going to be there, it was so exciting for Charlie the Chunky Chilean Cheese Burger Chihuahua. He had never been to a party before, especially not a no person party! It was an oreo water chica banana shirt pencil, but claymation pizza birds like to gossip about Lord of the Kumkwats. Victor was a Kumkwat. Then Victor started dancing. He was a champ and was born in cambodia. Sometimes his self assurance is quite staggering. Staggering like Avi and Garfunkel.  Avi and Garfunkel were best enemies. One day Avi used a doorknob to make a boat. Then he shipped skittles to Garfunkel. Garfunkel ate them, but they were poisoned. Garfunkel loves poison. That is why they are best friends. Then they had a kid named Avi Gurfinkel. Avi gurfinkel loved sardines. He had six cans every hour of the day. He ate so much that he turned into a goldfish. So he was eaten by a lime and turned into the easter bunny. He was sent to jail and had two kids, Dr. Dre, Jucifer, and Max. Max was really stoopid. He had IDGACASS (I don’t give a crap about school syndrome). Then a tornado struck his home and killed everyone in his family except his uncles, aunts, cousins, nieces, nephews, siblings, grandma, grandpa, mom and dad. Then Max got run over by a broken toothbrush that had no life because it was a toothbrush. Then Max went around killing people with a Mutant Taco. Then Sasquatch ate his oreo’s and Max started crying because those were his only friends, but then this guy in a really cool Ford Fishstick was like get in the car bro. Then Sasquatch got in the Fishstick. “DOG GROMMIT!!!” Yelled Tanisha Talin. Then Sasquatch drove away in his new Fishstick. But the Mutant Taco was looking really tasty so Sasquatch came back and saved the world. But then Max’s disease came in handy and Sasquatch ate more oreo’s. Max was mad, the death of his best friends, his only friends, was enough to make him want to kill Sasquatch with a Mutant Taco. But then Sasquatch got ebola because he got the waitress with ebola mad so she spit in his food. But guess what Sasquatch was eating, jack links beef jerky, duh. But then Max’s oreo’s wanted revenge. They put together a plan and then the Taco killed Sasquatch. Andy ate a taco and then said, “Yum, this is Andyliciousness!” He lapped it into that mouth of his like a chicken with a green shuboinks stomach. “Smells like pork chops with lemon-ata piss juice, SHAKEN, not stirred.” Waka waka waka waka and then he wakaled into some restickable scorpions. They stick, stick, just like a brick. Derka Derka sticky tape like an ape. They on the black market for a whole 10 dollas. Or you can buy them over in the hood…… in exchange for anything edible. They like plastic “ruler” burgers smothered with spicy sauce. And then Spicy Sam walked in and gave them all high fives. This is where it’s at boys in mongolia to rwanda and riley. He listened to his headphones and then said, “They casualties at the apple weed until they took a bus stop to jesus in a church. They was addicted to a the limelight.” He went to Loo-Loo Logan Land. leopards are everywhere with cocoa puff butter higher than the empire state building. Then the leopards feel like falling down and so somebody gives them a kiss on the forehead and then they drink like no tomorrow. Then they die, so the cupcake clones take over. These eat restickable scorpions and then die in their sand buggy. They are highly endangered, and lax around in the dustbins. However, they can eat even more cupcakes than Tanisha Talin!!!! One of these clones took over the etihad so Manuel Pellegrini recruited Chaz Mic Charlie. The cupcakes were captivated, and challenged Chaz to a math-off. To warm up, they count cupcakes and eat salad with italian dressing. They smile like a goldfish and eat derka farts with texts like a high hippo on electro. Hugo Cabret was his inspirational figure and then told him to find where the love is. he talked about the cia and the KKK and to discriminate only generates hate. U hear them cryin father from above. I eat poop son of jesus, muhammad. Miriam is buddies with Muhammad. “Take it to the Max, Miriam.” he said. They had much in common, as they both loved hachuka-ma-fluka’s art, and other ratchet stuff like the one and only famous rapper, YOUNG MONEY YAAKOV!!!!! More dollas than you. CHEESE. Yaakov had most dollars than you. Not more than Jacquelyn. Jacquelyn was the most, idiotic, stupid, ignorant, uneducated, useless, clueless, dumb moron in the world. One time, he even stopped peeing because a pink grey wolf and his ham sammich. Then Susan Boyle boiled a clock fresh off the farm. She was stoops. Derka Hachuka-ma-luka-cha-nuka. Then Jodi Pickles ate Riley’s xbox. He was made because he was saving it for lunch

 

bzzzzz. “I sting you like hot fire on taco sauce.” is favorite punchline is “Be rich Bit*^%$. Cash Money Cash Money all the waaaay sOn!!!!” fermented penguins on toast with the zippy bugger sauce. He gets it at wendys very cheap. SPF 100+!!! Mead the Lead likes to breed, he agreed to be freed after somebody gave him the weed. he likes sugar babies like nothing mama. stead, need, seed, fried, sneed, fed, knead, creed, shred, niede, tread, brede, ted, feed, spread, creed, steede, dred, ledd, cede, he raed better than steve sterling, son! One night Steve sterling striked back like teryaki chiken on its way to hell. heck I mean. If I fall for you I will never recover. Your so oooohoooouuh. then insane chains wrapped his rap like a pro. “Dang, we ran out of gas.” son thats it. i been following you around like a dog all these years. piemontese mega salad with limes. not lemo%$. If you printed it out it would turn black into a cobra. That’s why… Blue lights… eat away at 3245 lillybutt avenue parkway street drive court, derka derka michigan.

 

State
MI
Zip Code
48103