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The warmth you gave off is what saved me. He said I am naive and don’t know what love is. Andrew is wrong, I do know what love is and how it feels. Living with optimism that the next day will be better.  Obsessing over when I get to see you again, counting down the minutes before turning joyful. Victory which happened when you told me that you liked me. Even though, that wasn't the answer I got when I told you I loved you. It wasn’t the point. 

 Your breathing is spasmodic and I know things changed. Thinking your smile can be enough to keep me believing the lies you told. I am a dumb girl that wouldn’t notice your distance. Should I be mad that you are deserting me? A person who would go to the extent of hanging off a cross like the King of Jews. 

Releasing me from your strong but faltering arms, our smiles dim. I used to compare your smile to the sun, now it is being covered by anxiety. "I'm sorry, love." You call me that, it makes me wonder if you are even capable of that emotion.  


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