You’re not Anorexic.
Spend every day wasting away the seconds in longing for the next time you’ll eat
A 10 calorie Jello
Feel your world go black when you stand up too quickly
Feel your body shrivel away
Your bones dissolve
Into a pool of control and anxiety
Feel your hair thin away like a naked tree in the peak of winter
Never get more than five hours of sleep
Your body will wake you up from a gnawing, relentless hunger
As if begging you
Just feed me
But you’re not anorexic
I mean, you don’t look anorexic
You just look thin
Actually, you look great
Better than ever before.
Keep doing whatever you’re doing
You, are always there.
No matter the time, day, month, year
You refuse to lift up your bear claws
And spare me the luxury of just a few seconds to breathe
All I need is a few seconds
But my pleas are irrelevant to you, instead your fangs seep further into my self-lifting mantras with loathing screams of irrationality
You call out an open season on my esteem my flaws are accentuated
My mistakes bantered
My success undermined
Until your avaricious, beastly mouth is satisfied with this season’s kills
This year you’ll get to bring home
The cornerstones of my fleeting buoyancy are no more
But at least you’ll be eating well this year,
A female’s body
Embrace ladylike features with magic wands of bewitching mascara
and smooth, blood red lipstick.
Torture misogyny with
spells of equality
Explore subdued feminine sensuality with
necklines so low
skinny jeans so sculpted
Traverse self-identity through fleeting haircuts and colors.
Brew nuanced individuality
Thrust your athame into the cornerstones of double standards
Never apologizing for the former.
Embody sex-appeal and sophisticated glamor not to satisfy society’s demands of perfection
Not to receive half-assed validation from the aggressive mouths of lascivious men
But to feel at home in your intimate, perpetual lair