“Let’s try this,” I said to myself. “No, it’s wrong. Mr. Dover,” I called.
“Just a second.”He finished up with another kid and then came to me.
“I don’t understand what it's asking me to do,” I say.
“Well try more maybe you’ll get it soon.”
“No you don’t understand, I have tried so much,” I say as my eyes start to tear up.
“Well try more,” he said. I sit there staring at my paper trying so hard not to cry. My eyes start swelling from holding it in, suddenly I burst into tears, everyone looking at me, judging, laughing.
I have never run that fast in my life, I ran into the bathroom locked myself in the stall and sat there for the rest of school.
I walked home feeling the worst I have ever felt, it was like a wrecking ball hit me right in the head painfully crushing my skull. When I got home my mom asked how school was, “It was really good,” I said. It was the first lie I had ever said to my mom. She said that we we’re having my favorite meal, spaghetti and meatballs. I said cool and walked away into my room to go on my phone and just stare at my old friends texts between us.
When I woke up the next morning I asked my mom if I could skip school, she said no. I started to cry, “What’s wrong,” she asked.
“Nothin, I’m just humiliated in math I’m the dumbest kid in class and I try and try and I can’t get the right answer and then I ask the teacher for help he says to try harder, and yesterday I said that I’m trying my best to him after he said to try more, and he said to try even more and I suddenly burst into tears and sat in a stall for the rest of the school day.” “It will be boring but I’ll call the school and tell them you're sick and you can go shopping with me.
The next school day my mom came in with me to talk to the math teacher about me and him not helping me when I ask for it which I’m happy that she’s doing but it is honestly even more embarrassing than bursting into tears in front of my whole class. It looked like the entire class was listening in on their conversation. I mean honestly could my mom be any less subtle.
“My son has been working his head off trying to understand, your math that you give him with absolutely no direction, or explanation! When he asks you for help you do not just tell him to try harder even a random guy from the street would know that!” She said if him not helping me doesn’t stop I have to switch schools. That day I started going to a new class. It was where they helped me on my school and homework. It is the dumbest class ever they act like I’m 5 years old, but it has been kinda nice not stressing about how much stuff I have to do.
Finally, the end of the week. Fridays are cool cause I don’t have to deal with the stupid kids and teachers that make me feel like crap inside, I mean the weekend is boring too cause I have nothing to do because I don’t have anyone to do things with but it’s better than being “bullied” by a teacher. When the day ended my mom drove up to me and picked me up. It was nice until I saw her melancholy face and wearing the necklace that her grandma gave her before she passed. She only wears it when she needs luck. I asked why she looked sad.
“There is something I need to show you.”
“Alright?” She showed me a test that my teacher took to see if I had signs of a special need. My mom tried to hide that they thought I had special needs but it’s not like I think I do, I just think I’m stupid but my mom is so worried that she started to sleep next to me and check my breathing while I sleep because she thinks I hit my head really hard and that might be why.
I took another test at the doctor and I don’t have anything wrong with me. The doctor just said I’m just really stupid but in some kinda doctor terms that I couldn’t understand but my mom told me that he basically said that I was stupid.
Finally, the last day of school and the last time I ever have that unnecessary, useless, unwanted, passive aggressive, just straight aggressive math teacher. I have never been this excited to leave anything but then again I’ve never actually wanted to leave anything, but now I do. I’m walking down the hall fresh off telling the math teacher everything I have been thinking about him this past year because they couldn’t suspend me cause there was only one more minute left in the school year. The only thing he could do without getting fired as a teacher is say that I was being disrespectful or like call my parents, and as I thought of that I instantly regretted that.
The bell rang the final bell of the 8th grade. I ran out of the building and then suddenly had a total anxiety attack about if Mr. Dover would tell my mom. What if mom didn’t care? What if she did care and will ground me for the entire summer? What if he doesn’t even care that I called him those things? What if my mom just laughs because it was cool how I did that? I mean she hated him to so what are you gonna do.
I got home walking in the door with everything able to be crossed on my body crossed now. I don’t believe in god but if he’s out there gimme a little love right now. I put the key in my door and I slowly turned it as slowly as I could and walked in… she wasn’t home. She left a note that said Happy Summer and nice job taking down Mr. Dover. I loved that good laugh.