The New Steam Beds

A descriptiou of the new apartment iiouse being built in New York, says that the bedsteads are stationary, aud that the slats of the beds are steam pipes, instead of wood, so that there is i constant warmth kept up all the time. This may be all right in New York, but out west here the psople want bed slats, regular old-fabhioned bed slats, a little too short, so that they will fall down occasionally and let the mattress fall on the floor. A house where the midnight clatter of the falling bed sint is never heard, and where the white-robed head of the family is not seen raising up the mattress with one hand, and feeling under the bed for a bed slat with the ether, is a mournful sight. There is something singular about the fall of the bed slat. Statistics show that the bed slat always falls when the man of the house is sound asleeep, and the woman of the house is sound awake. The flrst indication the man has that there is a fall in lumber, is the scream of murder that comes from the sleeping partner of the flrm; and when the man wakes and finds that his head and f eet are high inough, and that his body is closed up like a foot rule and gt?ntly resting on the floor, he knows instiuctivaly that there are no burglars in the house, but he cannot convince the screamer that such Í8 the case, even alter the slat is put in its place, until he goes down stairs and looks the house all over. What conneetkm there is supposed to be betweer the fall of the bed-slat and the superstition that a burglar has got into the house, is more than anybody could ever teil. Eeason would dietate that loosening a bed-slat so it would fall down and break the hiuge of a man'a back, would be the last thing on earth that a buiglar would do if he got in a house; but in such cases the poor man has got to convince his audience that burglars are not present, or there will be "no sleep till morn." Another thing that has struck forcibly the scientists who have investigated the fall of the bed-slat is, that while the v.ife who trembled at the catastrophe was wide awake at the moment of the fall, and for hours before, when the slat is put back and the husband goes on his Arctic exploration for the alleged burglar, the wife goes to sl.ep before he gets back, and as he stub3 himself back intD the room with chills and profanity, he is greeted with a snore that is not reassuring. Such excitement has become so productivo of sleep to the eyes of the f emale screamer that we are told many men who have nervous wives arrange the bed-slats so they will fall at any time when sleep fails to come, and many are thus put to sleep by the fall of the bed-slat, when opiates have lost all power over the patiënt. This probably illustrates the force of habit as well as anything that could occur. With the new stationary bed stead, with steam-pipes, we looked for nothing but misfortune. The beds will be either too warm or too cold. and the crackling noise that always comes from steam-pipes in the night, will cause sleepers to jump up aud yell for the pólice. Besides, suppHe a steam-pipe under a bed should fxplode. Oue cannot think of the red uit without a shudder. We predict that those who adopt the beds run by steam, will speedily return to the time honored and useful bed-slat. Steam is all right in its place, and it does many wonderful things, such as hatching chickens and running locomotives, but we do not believe it can ever be utilized as a sleeping utensil to advantage. - Peck's Sun. A mixture of eight parts alcohol, tw parts immenia, and one part ether is very efflcacious in removing grease spots from clothing. It should be applied, and rubbed diligently with clear water and a sponge. The chemistry of the thing is that the alcohol and ether dissolve the grease, while the ammonia and water act as a soap in washing it away. "Crushed-strawberry" red and raspberry pink are the fashionable colora for the gingham dresses worn by brunettes. They are trimmed with white embroidered muslin.