Sense And Nonsense

Cr.ATro style- An ojocn fire-placc. I f dm Hitte mouse In the plural is mies, 'Lliu plural of house sliould bo coi-tainly mee. A.N African proverb saya the idle are dead, but caunot be burie-A. One advertisement in tho newspaper i h two on the suis of an old shed. - i yrrislovon HeroM, Farmer' s daughters are eharming, and. when they boeome old maida tlicy itchiess. - fowa Register. ïhf. lis-ht of experieneo has shoivn 'j.is uo mi ■ m tho gun Ttaan 'tis to blow out tüe g A HOTS8BSHOB is eonsidcred a sign of rood luok when you own about nine hiuidred pounds of ffood horseflesh on which to nail it Otherwise it worksm botter as old iron. " How PAB Is it to Butler, if I keep Btra'ght on!" " Wall, if you're a gom to keep straight ou, it'8 about twentyfiirB thmiflftnd miles, bvit if vou turn round t'other way it's about half a inile!" Do not wait for luck to bear yon on to fortune. If nothing turns u, roll up your sleeves and tura something up. Fortune and fanie await the man wlio will puraue t hem with sufficient determination.- Bes Meines Register. Nihb out of overy ten women in America btiv their ttair instead oí raisin2it. Sucha state of affairs should nótexist in a country that annuaUy sftends thousands of dollars for the support of an Agricultural Bureau. _ The expluits of umbrella tmeves ra Philadelphia during the Graat week were exceedingly audacious. A man standinjr in the niain hall of the Contiiental ïwinging an umbrella betvveen his leo-s was relieved of all the public property he had. Before he could turn about the thief had vanished in tho orowd. feil into the hands of tho professors at the Detroit Medical College, wlio used him for vivisection. A part of the skull had been removed and iome of his brains taken out when his roaster found him. ïhe brute was put onder ourative treatment, and is reoovering, but will never know as mucU as he did before the operation. "Do rou raise pears m Lommana, Mr. Sheridan?" said President H to our genial Recorder of Deeds last week at tli e White House, while a deler o-ation of horticulturists were present. "We do wheneverwe hold three oí a kind," replied the gentle George,- at which varióos of the fruit-growers smiled ftudibly.- N. 0. Times _ Peobabltyou neverheard of agmgeibread barometer. A French editor has one- a General in gingerbread. Be buys oae at a fair once ayear and naila it, to the wall at home. Damp weather softensaml dry weather haruens gingerbread, and the editor can teil t.y tbuching tbc figure with his fmger wast kind of a day it is going to be. Jl-st as he finishcd his little serenade, the moon came out from behind a cloud, and she, the mother of the moon oL his heart leaped to the window and upon ]im emptied abont two gallons of cistern-water. "After me the deluge, he simply and prettily said; and, as he walken briskly away, the plashmg aqueous in his light guitar made it sound as thoufh he were earrying home a jug. Oh! that Monday could be postponed to the middle of the week. Everythmg e-ocs wrong side up Monday mormng. People get out oí their bed ia a huJ, eat breakfast because they are obhged to and como down tovn in a iit of thc sulks. The fact i?, Sunday just givea rest enoiüjh to make a man feel the need of more, and Monday finda him mad because he can't gct it.- Chicago Times. A Hartford man's excuse for atealing a pair of chickens was that while at work he huns his coat near fche coop, and 011 going for it he íouml the chickent voosted on the same, ría hadn't the heart to wake them up, he gaid, so he wound his coat around them without waking thcm, and carried tliem off. His defense was ingenióte, but he was sent up íor three months all the same. Some Harvard students offered tho printer 300 for an ad vanee copy of tho quostions to bc Bubmitted to them at an examination. Tho printer had completed the job and parted wtth the sheets; but ho obtained an old set ol questions, put them in type and struck off a proof, whloh he sold to the students for the $300. Thcy did not discover tho doublo quality of the traud until examination day. As a sédate old man entered a railroad with his wife at Truro, Cal., a flask of whisky feil from his pocket. A passeno-cr pieked it up and oftered to return ft. " O, it ïsn't my nuspanu , the woman said, "ho never dvmks or carries liquar. "No, It'a not mino, the man added, nneasily. At the next station the couple left the tram; but bcfore it started the passengers wero amused to see the oíd man como back to claim the flask. A witness In a case at Kashville was asked whether he had much erperienoe in and knew the cost of feeding cattle, and to give his estímate of the cost of feeding a cow? to which ho replied: " My fatfier before me kept a dairy. I hare had a -real deal of experience in buyina, andselling. and keeping cattle, as a man and boy, in the dairy business for fifty years. I think my long exiierience bas qualüïed me to know as well is any man can the cost of-keepin"- and feeding cattle." "WeU, broke in the attorney, impaticntly. teil me the cost of keeping a oow. "Well, sir, my experionce, after fifty veara in the business, is. thafc it costs well it dependa entirely on how niuch you feed the cow." . jth In a paper on actions of lile Mtnout air, Pasteur maintalns that in the animal economy phenomenatakes place of the same order :is in ferment:ition. Oxygcn acts not only by eüectmg combustions, bul by pving an artivity to the cellules, frora which they denve the power of aetion beyond the miluenceoffree oxygen, in the mannertff the f erment cells.