A Beef Trust Victim

I have banished the meat from my table,
The flesh of the sheep and the cow,
For a poor man is wholly unable
To purchase such luxuries now,
And the chops that I took from the hands of the cook,
And the bacon and things of that ilk,
Are replaced by some stuff that is tasteless and tough,
Like hay that's been simmered in milk.

I sit me tonight at my dinner,
And I think how a porterhouse fine
Would fill up the vacuum inner
Of this physical framework of mine,
But I'm sorry to state that they give me a plate
Of a mixture like sawdust and glue,
And I'm told that it's good, that it's
Dash's health food,
And it's cheaper than roast or ragout.

I am not a carnivorous person
In the actual sense of the term,
But I cannot keep writing my verse on
A diet like this, I affirm:
For breakfast whole wheat, though it's simple to eat:
For luncheon, mor wheat that is cracked,
And for dinner a deal of some mushy cornmeal--
That;s a little too much, for a fact.

I retire to my bed, and in slumber
I dream of a happier land,
Where turkeys are wondrous in number
And there's mutton on every hand.
There, in spirit elate, I am filling my plate
And the fork's going lipward * * * Just then
I'm awakened to hear, from a voice at my ear,
"The price of beef's risen again!"

-John O'Keefe in New York Press