When Yer Ma An' Me Got Tied

Ther' wa'n't no fuss an' feathers, an' ther' wa'n't no great parade,

Ner ther' wa'n't no weddin' breakfast ner no weddin' marches played.

It wa'n't no high noon weddin'; 'twas dark as Sambo's hide,

'Cause yer gran'dad wa'n't invited when yer ma an' me got tied.

Ther' wa'n't no string of kerridges lined up in front th' door,

But jes' my old red sulky, with th' gray mare hitched afore,

An' yer ma slid down a bedcord while I held my arms out wide

So's to ketch her ef she tumbled, when yer ma an' me got tied.

We didn't give no invites, an' ther' wa'n't no kinfolk there, But ye couldn't jes' have called it a quietlike affair,

Fer her dad wa'n't far behind us, an' th' gray mare like to died

A-scootin' fer th' parson's when yer ma an' me got tied.

Th' parson didn't wear no robe ner none too many clo'es,

Jes' pants an' coat an' nightcap an' th' specs upon his nose,

An' some folks of his was present, so's it couldn't be denied

That th' thing was did all hunky when yer ma an' me got tied.

Ther' wa'n't nobody weepin' ner a-shakin' hands around,

But jes' about th' finish ther' come a smashin' sound,

An' yer gran'dad struck th' weddin' jes' in time to kiss th' bride,

An' his langwidge- it was awful, when yer ma an' me got tied.

-Lippincott's Magazine