Better Trade Somewhere Else

Mr. Bryan's arguments from hogs and hens and otlier specimens of animated nature and farm producís, to show from the hogs that the rooting capitalists need rings in their noses in the shape of fifty-cent dollars in order to keep them from making too much money out of the toiling masses - and then from the hens that the silver product of the whole world will be worth $1.29 an ounce so soon as anybody or any Government that can afford it will agree to take it at that, by his illustration of the man who could inake eggs worth 25 cents a dozen by buying them at that price no matter what might be the cost of production - these arguments are unquestionably ingeniou8 and eloquent, but after all, a trine confusing. He recalls the story of the man who opened an account with an old lady who sold, among other things, peanuts and beer. "How much," said he to the old lady, "do youask f or peanuts?" "Three cents a measure," said she. "Ah ! yes ; put me up three cents' worth of peanuts." The old lady haviug put up the peanuts, the purchaser said : "I see you sell beer. How much do you ask for beer?" "Three cents a glass," said the old lady. Then, after a moment's refiection, the purchaser said : "Well, on the whole, I think I' 11 take a glass of beer instead of the peanuts," handing back the package of peanuts. A little desultory conversation followed, after which the purchaser started to go. "I begyour pardon, sir," said the old lady, "but you haven't paid for the beer." "Why, no, of course not," said the customer. "I gave you the peanuts for the beer." "But," said she, "you did not pay for the peanuts." "Pay for them? Of course I didn't," said the customer. "Why should I? I didn't take them." ! The old lady being, like some of Mr. Bryan's followers, a little slow in her mathematica, but of a confiding nature, after a pause, slowly replied: "You seem to be a very sincere man, and "what you say is no doubt correct, through 1 don't "quite understand it. But will you be good enough hereafter to trade sotnewhere else?" A great many good, honest voters, who have been liatening to and reading Mr. Bryan for the last two months will doubtless reach the same conclusión in November - that he is probably sincere, though they do not quite uuderstand him, but, on the whole, they would rather he