Sure Of A Fine Funeral

The town of Lubec, Me., is one of th go-ahead villag-es of the Pine Tree state and the one thing to enable i to keep up with the proeession is hearse. The citizens investí ga ted th condition of surrounding towns, anc learned that every one of them had hearse, and they considered it rv burnin and municipal shame that Lubec sbouk be so far behind the times. Therefore it was resolved to have one, although according to the rates of longevity i Lubec, it was not considered likely ther would be much use for it, says th Lewiston Journal. A mass meeting of the citizens wa called to discuss the grave subject. Th enthusiasm was unbounded, and i was at once decided to purchase the vehicle by voluntary subscriptions, making a sort of joint stock concern or hearse Corporation. Each subscriber chipped in one dollar, but the wary and thrifty Lubecker insisted upon a proviso whereby he is enabled to get a show for his white ally. It was unanimously agreed that if any stockholder had use for the hearse within a certain number of years from the date of his subscription, he, the said subscriber, should be entitled to a rebate of the sum paid in. Now the Lubecker awaits the approach of the grim destróyer without emotion. In the event of his death, he is assured of a first-class funeral, with plumes and all the outward trappings of woe, and he gets his money back besides.