An Artistic Barber

They do some things better in la belle France, says the Philadelphia Record. In a tonsorial emporium near the state house yesterday, Ga'spaxd, the French barber, waa operatief? u;?a a fat broker. The latter, comp!; :..;' ..; ;, the American custom, turned u to the left as he reclined in the ■ r. ::v, presenting to Gaspard his right ccek for the caresses of the razor. Si i tliis, Gaspard walked to the left side of the chair, bringing himself vi.j-a-vi wifh his subject. Broker turned his face to the right. Gaspard returncd to the right side of the chair. Victun agam turned nis face to the left. Gatpard, wildly excited, flourished his miniature blade in terrifying proximity to the customer's physionomical beauty. "Scare' m'sieur!" cried the Frenchraan; "pardonnez moi; but vil you not pleas keep steel while I you ehaife? I feex you wiz towaile- I r-r-ub you wiz lathaire- I prepaire you to shaife! You not no wees to be shaife?" By this time the barber had secured a death grip on the broker's forelock and the victim ceased to struggle. Gaspardproceeded to wield the razor in a calm and strictly professional way, at the same time enlightening the broker as followe: "Par dong, m'sieur, you nevaire not shaife by a French barbaire? Non? Ah-h-h! I vill expiain. Ven I beegeen to shaifo un gentilhomme I wiz to see his falsa In front of me. Comprehendez? Your American barbaire, your Dutch Cherman barbaire, your niggaire barbaire - vat zey do? Zey stand at ze baick of your head. Zey scraipe, scraipe, voü, two minutes. Zen zey say: 'Dóse zo' razaire hurt you, saire? Bah! Canaille! Ze artist tonsorriel, ze French barbaire hc do like me. I etand vaire I see m'sieur's faise. Your eyes zey ia elos?. Nevaire mind. I vatch your eyeleeds 3 vatch your eyelash. I make one leetle scraipe, two leetle scraipe, on your cheek. I see your eyeball qu-viver eeside, jost a leetle. I say 'd zat razier!' I put Leem down. I know he hurt you. I get anozair. But eef you look like you dream of hefen, I know zat ze razair not hurt you. Ah, m'sieur! Ze Americaine barbaire no good; ze Dutch Cherman barbaire no good; ze niggaire barbaire no good. Ze French barbaire, he ees zee vereetable artist- and I, m'eieur, I lairne my trade in Paree."