I Marcus Aquario give this statement of my own free will.

Manny was a special kid. He has big dreams. He was inspired. His eyes would be surprised as if he saw something. Nothing was there. Manny just didn't give a damn. His tears flood raging across his cheeks. I could never solve the reason for his ways. He just wanted to break the spell the family cycle. He went off the map. Manny wasn’t manny, Manny was God. Until I learned he was diablo. The devil in all of us. Manny said kill him for fear of my life, I did it. I would know what he would do if I didn’t, I am his brother. I rarely talk about this so tell someone I dare you. I will have you hogtied with your corpse singing the ABC’s. Ok well it all started with burning rubber yea.                

We went to Arizona in a candy painted el Camino, he said a vision told him too, so he’s my little brother I don’t want him getting hurt or put away as a crazy man so I scooted in the passenger with my Yankee cap on, slammed the door the whole shebang. A dude hands him the bag and it's a black bag so, he says these are the tools which the divine lord shall work through. So you know- I’m assuming it's bibles, Even though I know Manny is crazy he has a sensitive side he writes poems so that's his bible since he is God. We drive back to Florida and I go.

“Tell someone and I will kill you.” he told me, so I told no one I just let him do his thing and followed along. Pretty soon I heard thumping on my doors. I was reclined on the couch and the sunlight made a shadow over the barren bush of sticks behind. I watched T.V. I grunted stumbling cuz I’m hung over right, My eyes drooping and shit, And I’m like what do you want? It was an eyewitness news guy he asked me, we have a couple questions. Hu ha alotta questions, I turned my head back hollering My tongues all slurry and I repeated “This man has a-lotta questions.” They told me my face was all red flooding on my cheek bones. “Sure, hit me I was ready and just pissed off I wanted to be alone. Reading his scripted lines looking up he inquired “Do you have knowledge of Manny Aquario A.K.A Ruddy?” Yea that’s my brother, I told him.” Are you aware of his gang related activities, would it be correct to say it is a gang?» The reporter's eyes gently squiggles up seeming concerned biting his lip. So I reply “It is not a gang.” “What is it then?” he blurted. And I’m like this dude an asshole. “It is a support group a brotherhood.” For alcoholics! The reporter rudely interrupted. Fuck this I said “You know what; I don’t have to take this bull from the likes of you.” I slammed the door mumbling.

Later that night Manny showed up to a meeting through the grey windows on the tiny section of the market aisle center to town. He was angry speaking bombastically about how the war on drugs is pointless handing out the meth, saying the war on drugs is pointless raising an octave annoyed. The war on terror is endless going hard on those s’s. The crowd of elderly and young all intoxicated nodded yuh leaning back. The fools were in a trance. I swore Manny was that type of guy. He could wave his hands and split a sea of people and just as easy make it all red he was Moses. His curly greasy hair shook as he slammed his hands stating “I am a god if you do not follow me to heaven's gate then suffer the fate, you hear but don’t listen. This world needs a vigil of lights you will be my candles. We are all the same pick up your caskets you walking corpses walk with me through this alley way.                                        

The lazy eyed voluptuous and anorexic welted scabbed crowd stared lazy eyed but his message resonated. He sought to elicit reaction from lightning; he pulled a Benjamin and lit it on fire. America’s dead presidents control nothing he orchestrated this with his hands. Claim power you have LOST.

I was confused. He called me up I hopped on near the podium he said gather the money. Ok I agreed. Seeing the burning glassiness of his hazel eyes He was cold also. White towels lined Manny’s back. The addicted fiends mouths would water with dribble when he’d give his ‘shrooms, meth, and baggies. The mac 10 was on his hip. I snatched the money feeling the layers of it in my hand. It felt wrong. My brother Manny moseyed out of the shop they all hailed him along the way. Mothers in pink shirts cuddling their babies asked for autographs, he always stayed humble with sheepish expressions for public appearances then. My duffel was filled.

The pollution filled the air. The skies amethyst color over the obsidian rocks being bound by a beam of scattering sunset like rubber bands hold cash. Over the obsidian rocks and below that white sand slope he trudged talking to himself. I scratched my head thinking it's about to get real.

I saw him emerge out of the fern filled trails, I got on tiptoes to tap him,” Manny” He paused as to give bad news choking on his words like vinegar it was like a break up in a way. He recanted then returned. I couldn’t deal

“This isn’t right.” I plead. He just stared over the dying magenta light over the ocean. He swiveled shaking his head with an airy voice he proceeded “Such a shame brother we only have started with this money we shall flee as cool as the night he proceeded “How could you back out on your brother” Tell anyone about this - he took out his gun and pressed it against my earlobe. MY body stiffens up, His voice teased me “Now listen, I will kill you nothing comes between me and my money we have come so far in convincing..” his face reddened intensely grunting.

Just take the money, I felt the barrel thrust. My knees quivered. I perspired profusely “o k-k kay buh brother I will tuh tell no one, you know what keep the money”. Manny glared. Manny assumed I was trying to be better than him; AWW little saint “Marcus scared, Manny that's impossible!

            “Bang a bullet tore my calf I could still smell the brimstone. Manny coldly walked away. Everything blurred but I saw a bearded Asian teen wearing a leather jacket rubbing his own chin. He signaled manny to come over with the bags of purple pills and marijuana belts.

The Asian kid with his posse handed him a huge bag of money. “Manny it's great doing business with you.” he roared patting his shoulder while I was stinging and burning with pain. Yea see mans I have plans for you. “I have a proposition.” he smiled.  A large bald bulk buff man emerges from the sides of the trail. I blacked out while the man shanked him.

His long curly locks sprung forward puking blood. I saw the fading and groaned for help. I felt a little happy but I was reminiscing. The bastard who shanked my brother stood atop laughing as demons gossiped in the trees the waves drew closer. The outline of humongous clouds dimmed as lightning struck the obsidian rocks surface while manny takes an inverted gasp dusting off his blackened lungs. His last words and I remember them still haunt me. Help me! Why did you allow me to take it this far bruh? Hey I suppose I am becoming a god he said in a lowering sleepy tone . I couldn't help but be paralyzed with fear. Lu said blood in blood out. The reporters later came at my door I pondered how things never finish. I started this and it will never finish the memories won’t leave me. This is what happens when kid’s nightmares go too far.

If there’s one thing it’s no rest for the wicked and I am guilty by association.

Poem for Manny at funeral

The suicidal candle

I loved him

I feared him

Light and fire

Should have stopped him

Now his caskets dropping

With a part of me in it too

I will never be the same

The wind blew the light house left

Burning down our house

I could have contained

But instead here I remained

Living in the tombs just like you

Hoping to elicit reactions from lightning