Additional Roundabouts

The star postal route to Athlone, vlonroe county, has been discontinued, and Athlone "is alone, och hone!" Lawyer Gaskill, of Lapeer, wants armer's creek straightened, while the stream is low. Yes, now is the time to take it by both ends and snap the kinks out of it. The pastor of Wayne Congrega tional church has been given two week's vacation without a cut in his salaTy. Matters are brightening up since the passage of the tariff bill. A petition is about to go to Congress from Green Oak, asking for eight days in a week, to allow the Hamburg and Green Oak ball clubs a week day, instead of Sunday, for heir game. The Brighton Express is a new ight, lately hung up in the literary heavens. It is said to be resplendent with the intellectual coruscaions of a corps of competent ediors, who will make the Express as utninous as the phosphorescent effulgence of a midnight grave yard. May such success as it shall deserve attend the Express. The Brighton Argus notes the arest and jail imprisonment of a son of the late Hon. Wm. P. Wells, of Detroit. Wells, it seems, had engaged to work for D. O. Van Amerg, of Green Oak, and in the absence of the family, stole an overoat, watch, razor and some jewelry nd left the premises, arrayed "like gentleman and a scholar." The secretary of the Hillsdale gas ompany played ball the other day and got a "hot grounder," which ie bound in raw beef and went bout some mechanical job, when a iece of steel "chipped" by a cold hisel struck him in the other eye, which he also bound in beef and groped about looking for a friend obliging enough to kick him. A thief, evidently aged in sin, last week ransacked the house of Hiram iewes, of Jackson, during the abence of the family. All that was missed was a small sum of money. Evidence of the antiquity of the hief was discovered in the presence of a lock of gray hair, which he eems to have shed in a collision with some angle in the room. We don't know how to ride a bicycle, but if we did we would sit up straight if we had to lift the fore part of the animal off the ground and ride on'on; wheel. - GrassLake Síews. Editor Carlton must have derived his airy confidence from the ellow who comes into the editor's office to leave a "snipe" on the edge of the table and explain to the editor how to run a newspaper. The Lapeer Clarion states as a sober truth "that the tarift is cerain to beat the democrats no mater what they do with' it. " The Clarion's efíort to utter a "sober" ruth is a boozy failure, and this is not its first abortive effort along that ine. Two democratie presidential victories and several houses of congress won on that issue, deny the sobriety of the Clarion's "truth." Afterracingamelonthief tillhewas 'just about blowed," Ed. Bassett, of Madison, Lenawee, having caught his man, loaded him in a buggy and started for Adrián. The thief's boots hurt his feet, and he was alowed to remove them, when he immediately skipped like a jack-rabbit, scaled a fence like a kangaroo, and 'aded away in the remoteness, leavïng Bassett in a state of meloncholy. While two Hillsdale men were absorbed in a watch trade in the middle of the street, they were knocked down and run over by two young ladies in a carriage. The Democrat says the men were "full of local option, astutenes, perspicuity and perspicacity," and yet the W. C. T. U., of Hilldale, boasts of the good work they have accomplished in behalf of temperance reform! It is not likely that the oriental war will attract much attention in this country till the base ball season is over. Monroe and Adrián, have each other by the hair, on account of a recent game; and the Wayne Review says: "The game last Thursday, between Dearborn and Wayne, finally broke up in a row, with Dearborn ahead. The umpire left on the first train, to escape being mobbed." A street fakir, the other night stood up in his buggy and glibly gabbed his gabby glib at Tecumseh. Then an untimely egg struck him in the neck and stained with ochre his beautifu shirt front. "I'll give S20 to know who threw the egg," yelled the fakir. Just then another rich hen berry, flavored with Ypsilanti min eral water, hit him squarely in the mouth and prevented him from of fering $40 for the man who threw it and grabbing his lines he drove furi riously out of the way and "fa from the maddening crowd" who sung as he disappeared: Shall we never more behold thee ? Never hear thy winning voice again He yelled back that they wouldn' if he could help it, and the inciden clos.ed.