Monroe Democrat Items

Grip has its arma around Ihe neeks of tiie Mi'ianese. Many of the gentier sex claim to tíave experienced a fonder eiubrace. A nuniber of Ypsilanti citizons are engaged in bootning the benefioial elïects of the local mineral water. Svea a person with incurable oatarrh can deteot no bad smell about it. Arthnr Brown, new utah Senator, radnated from the Michigan üiversity. Du Aun Arbor receutly, he met Arthnr Brown. late Washteiiaw county clerk and they looked so muoh alike that the only way they had of telling which was the other, was by their politics, the Utah Brown being a republioan while the Washtenaw Brown "woalQ see himself in , flrst." "After the ballisover, " the"inside" aud "ontside" fraternites of the üuiversity, who have lately made thenaselves speotacles for gods and men, by. their qnarrel over the management of the annual foot-shake, and who now pass each other by with a stoney glare of non-reoognition, will recover their senses and probably ask as a favor to be taken out to a back lot and chained in a reouznbent posture in sight of an unfettered male sheep, gifted with the maintainance of the Monroe doctrine. Fifteen cents gets a hair cufc in Dnndee, but it was with some reluctance that the barber last fall accepted that som from an old farmer who came in after oorn ontting time to have his "shock" harvested. The shears grated ou something and the barber investigated and pulled: out a ten inch scythestone. "Goldarn my skin,"cackled the old man, "if that thar aint the very whetstouo I stuck over my ear and lost, last hayin' time." Tbis is the report that'reaohes us, and whioh we believe to be true beoause we saw the man who told us.