The Beggar's Indignation

A beggar accosted a gentleman and whined: "I'm paralyzed in both oe 'ands, misti r, an oan'í wort, fer I can't grasp auythink with 'em. Could ye spare me a trine, mister?" "I'm áeaf, " replied : the gentleman. 'You'd better write down what you have to say. Here's a pencil and a piece of paper. ' ' "Deaf, is 'e?" thonght the beggar. 'Then 'e didn't 'ear about the paralysis." So he wrote down: "í'ye got a wife an six children starvin at home, mister. I'ye been out o' wnrk fer six munths an ham in a dreffel state of destertushun. " He banded the paper to the gentleman, who read it and said: "I thought you said you v,ere paralyzed in both hands and eouldn't grasp anything, aild yet you can write. " "Did - didn't ye say ye was deaf?" stammered the beggar, who now really did feel paralyzed. "Yes, just to find out if you were an impostor, which you are, as I suspect - ed, " replied the gentleman. "Well, of all the bloomin frauds, yer the biggest!" exclaimed the beggar. "The hidea of yer sayin ye was deaf an tryin to impose on a pore feller. " And he shuffled off, snifling the air