He Ate Up His Salary

HE ATE UP HIS SALARY

THE MAYOR OF ADRIAN VISITS THE MAYOR OF YPSILANTI.

And Makes a Meal of the Latter's Annual Salary Which Astonishes the Landlord, Who Didn't Know Stearns.

Willard Stearn, mayor of Adrian, original silverphonist, writer of sharp sayings in the Adrian Press, hardest kicker on proposed change of superintendents at the reform school for girls and great admirer of one Grover Cleveland, was invited by the rotund mayor of Ypsilanti with the fog horn voice, to help him celebrate the glorious Fourth in the Greek city. Now, an invitation like that is too good a thing for Stearns to ever decline. He took it in of course and incidentally he took in Mayor Allen also. Allen knew of course that Willard was a great silverite, but he did not know, what it would have been more to his financial advantage to have known, that the said Stearns is also a great eater. The genial Captain Allen, of course, wanted to do his duty by his guest in due form and he, therefore, ordered a dinner for his guest at the Hawkins house. He told the landlord that he proposed to spend his whole year's salary as mayor of Ypsilanti on that Stearns dinner. The landlord accordingly laid himself out and gave Allen his dinner on credit. Stearns made a speech just before the dinner hour, and anyone who has ever heard him talk knows that he exhausts the vital principle in a considerable amount of fuel in the effort. Immediately after the oration Stearns and Allen went in to dinner. The landlord being an Ohio man was all smiles over his distinguished guest. But as the meal progressed his change of countenance was kaleidoscopic. It gradually dawned upon him that Stearns' powers of consumption were like the mercy of the Lord. He was, however, finally removed from the table while the landlord declared another bargain like the one he made with Capt. Allen would send him back to Ohio and drive him into politics.