How Mark Twain Gave A Fire Alarm

Kansas City Times : Tlie Kev. J. Hyalt Smith knows more stoiïes ubout more people tlian ten average citizens. Anioiig them lie relates thU: Wlien I was living wlth my brother in Uuffalo, Miirk TVa'n occupied a cottage across thestreet. We didVt see very mucti of liiiiíl but one mornlng as we were enjoying our cigais on the veranda after breakfast, we saw Mark come to liis door in his dressing gOWD and slippers and look over at us. He stood at his door and unoked lor a minute as f making up It is mind about something and at last óuened tlie guteand carne louBging across the street. There was un u nocen pied rocking-chair on the veranda, and when my brother offered it to him lie dropped into It wlth a dgh of relief. He tmoked for :i few moinents and said : "Niee iiiorning." "Yes, very pleasant." "Öhouldii't wonder if we had r.iin by and by." "Well, we could stand it little." "This is a niee house yon have here? " "Yi's, we rather llku il.'' "Hmv's your fainily ? " "Quite well - and yours?" "Oh, we're all comfortable." There was anolher impressive silence, tnd linally Mark Twain OTOMed liis les, blew a pull' of sinoke into the iir, and in bis lazy drawl ii-m;irked: "I suppose you're a little surprised to see me over herc so early. Faet is, I haven't been so nelghborly, perbape, as I oujíht to be. We must meud that state of things. Uut this iDorulog Icaineovei because I thoavbl you inifílit be inteiested in kaowlng that your roof is on fire. It struck uie that it wciuld )r. il K001' dea il' - " But at the mcntion of fire the whole f.nnily dotted up stairs, trailing languafr all the way. When he had put the tire out and had returned to the veranda Mark wasn't tliere. Bill Nye says: "Don't attempt to cheat an editor out of a year's subscription to his paper or auy other sum. Clieat tlie inini.-ter, cheat the doctor, clieat the lawyer, cliuat anybody and everybody, but i: you havu any regará for future cousequiMici-s, don't fooi with the printer. lie will get even with you and inore too You will be up ÍOI office soine time, or mal muñe pulilic favor íor yonrself or souie of your triends, and jnst wben yoi lliink your lnck is a "thing of beautj and a joy forevcr," the printer will opeí upon yon and knock your alr castle into a cocked liat at tlie flrst tire, lle'U subdue yon, and iheu you'll cuss your tupid ily for a drlvellDg idlot, go añil hire Roma mu lo knock you down and kick you then for lallinir.