"not On The Bill."

servant, to teil the truth, is quite a fïequontsr of that place of intelleotual "public amusement," the theatro. That being known, allow me to in iorm vou, or rather remind you, that in that place, acting ia not exclusively con fiued to the stage; for if a few gossiptra will "lond me their ears,1' they shall hear of as good a farce as was ever produced on the board.s, which I was lucky enough to svitness, for the ediücation of Merourials, that ia, if they see tit to be edified thereby. A lew eveuings igo, while attonding '"Hamltt" at the ronowned St. Louis - my attention wus attracted toward a good-looking country Jake, whose wholo eyes were rivetad upon quite a lovely young lady. eated within a couple ol yarda oí hint. While we were looking at him, he rose from bis sea;, went around to whcro the young lady in question waseeatod, and to the astoniühment oí all, and the disrniy of the lady, before any one had any idea of his intentions, gave her a hea ty smack, The lady, covered with blush es, turned to her oscort for proteotiou: he, in rather a savae way demanded an explaüation ofsuch rudeness. With his tbuíiib ïoserted witlnn his vest sleeve, and his other hand extended, au if in expostulation, our hero, with a slight tinge of sharno on his liandsome visage, tlius addreseed nuher a mixed crovvd of" excited gentlemon: "Gentlemen, I don't karo a durn; tho fact is, I couldn't a helped, if I'd a had tu di tho nes minuit fur it. Jess taku me out. and give rae a tvholloping. I know I desarve t. But while I sot thero tliinkin' what a mighty nioe gal she wur, deristiWe desire kum outer me to kiss thatgal OF bust, ani, jeutlomen, ns I sed before, jess take me oat, and give me a good drubbin', for I dettarve it all. "Bat," said ht, resuming liis teat, and looking stageward, tlio lady having, in tho meantime, loft."But," said he, "I should like tu see the isller as kin du it." At that moment the play was intorrupted by an oar splitting,'"horse laugh," which only a theatrical audienue can havo any idea of, to the chagrín oi the leading star," who naturally enough deenied it incomprehensible - nono of the slage actorg knowingof any other performance but theirs in that building, at the same time. L":fL=' "YiTil vou belp mo out ol this mud hole?" said" a traveling druggist, who had jnst been copnpelled to stop his team in a mud hole, becatise hrs horses conldn't pull it out. "No, I oan't stop," said a Yankee, who was hoavily loaded, and wus fearful that he would bo too late for tho oars. "I wonld tnke it as a great favor, besides paying vou." said the dniggist. "What are you oaded with?" asked the Yankee. "Drugs and medicines," said he. "I guess I'll try to get you out, then, for I atn loaded wi'.h tornbstoDes." They wöre ëen travelidg tógéxhsr after that.