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Legal Witticisms

Legal Witticisms image
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In tbe Albany Law Journal we find these litile chirpings : Tho rsniark of an exchnngo " that ■aLDY of our successful lawyers con)neaued life as praaohrs," is gracefully correctod bj oue of tbe legal gentlemen roferred to, who bega leuve to state that he began life as au infant. A country justice of the peace, on liavini.; bis atteotioD called to the fact, as. he waa about to enter judgmeut in a oertain oase, that ho hud uut jurisdictiou ou account of the amount involved beirig ovor two hundred dollars, promptly responded : "Tbe court has thought of tbat, and discovered a remedy. The court wiil enter judgment for tbe full amount, and tin-u issue two executions, eaoh for a half." Iu a recent action against the corporation of Oanterbury, Euglaud, to recover datuages for injuries received by the plaiut.ü, he having beeu thrcnvii from his carriage u tho night time by coming in contact witli a pile of stones lelt in the higbway, the soinawbat nigular defensa was sot up that " tho accident would not have occurred in tho daytime, and that as d-irkness was the act of (iod, so was the accident" ïhe Lord Chief Justice is said to havo ruled against this poinfc vviili bohío warinth. Some yeara ago whilo a judge, who dow ocuupies a very high judicial position in the State, was holding cirouit ia oue of tho weotcru oountie.", a oase of a trivial cbaracter was callod up. His líonor, sornewhat " riled," remarked that such suits, instead of taking up the time of the court would be moro properly disposed of by submitiing the ráme to a jury of old women. The plaintifPfl attoruey quietly replied that, without taking exception to tho opinión of tho honorable court, ho tliought h3 oause could not have been brought beforo a more appropriute tribunal. IIow to Clean Cnnor.ios. In answer to Dumeroua inquirios, Prang1 1 Chromo si_ 8 : Wheu you clean thein, use a tolt cliauiois skin (a drop of oil untv restore olearness), or with a fir.o linen rag very ïlightly dampeued. Alwaya tenderly. Nuxt, henevor tfae virnieh coatlug is dull, bi uised, or rubbed, revariiisl) ït with thin mastiu varuith. Obrouius, liku oil paintings, shuuld not bo bung in u. ilark roem, but in one with a diíTusud light; and never oxposed to the dtreot raya of the mn. The chrotuos, lifter water color, keep and display bctior wheo plaoéd under giass, ns they laok tbe proteoting cover ol' the vari'inh. Tbe lais-e cliromos, after oil paiutings, display, as a general rule, best wben franjea like original paintings, [t is not neceisary to put any of tbeso under glass ; ït i.s a matter et' tasto - preserving tbem, at the same timo, from(iutt and rougb baudliug. A couceited fullow, who prtdea himself ou being able to explain and understand cveryihiug, was present during a couversation about applo bul ter. He had never heard tbe term before, and commeuoed repesting it to hiuaself, wbeu one of bis friends said to him : " Perhaps you do not koow what applo but;cr is '?", " Oh, yes, I do," was tho nnswer : " I supposo it is made from the milk of cows led ou applüb." A bridegroom at Torro Haute, Iudiana, broke off bis engagement while the minister was preparing for the ceremony, because bo bappened to glauco into tho Hible, and fouud the bride was sixteen year.i oldcr ihau the bilí of t-a.n called for. Ho said he didu't inroud to marrv uy old pcoplc if ho could help it


Old News
Michigan Argus