He Had Influence

IFrom the Eureka (Mo.) Sentina!.] A candidate for a county office was lounging around Main street, smoking his cigar and canvassing in his ïnind the chances for and against his election, when he was approached by a seedylooking stranger, who brouglit him to a halt and asked: "BeyouMi. ?" " That's my name," replied the candidate. " I s'pose you've never heem teil of me, hev yer ?" asked the stranger. " Oan't say that I ever enjoyed the pleasure of your acquaintance ; that ie, not to my knowledge, thougk I may have met you during my Eurcpean tour. I met a number of distinguished individuals then; perhaps you are one of them. " "No, sir, you did not meet me in Yewrop; though I might a' bin there if I'd a wanted ter. I've seen better days, and was wealthy in my time. I'm a forty niner, and hev hed more money than you could shake a stick at. " " Oh, button up your lip," said the candidate, who was gétting out of patience, " I'in cold and want to go in the house." " Bilt one word, and my business with you is ended- :not my business, but yours- it's for your own benefit that I make the proppsition." " Well, what's your proposition ?" " Now, look a here, afore we begin, I want you to know as I'm a rustier from taw. I've got more perlitical infloonce than you've got any idee on. I ain't no striker; I'd cut my head off afore I'd strike a candidate for a piece; but I must have money to spend with the boys, to keep them in the traces, as it were. Your name brings up reckleckshuns of my childhood's days; my folks to home had a hired girl of ver name, and for the sake of early reckleckshuns I want to stand in for yer. I want to see yer 'lected, and on 'leotion day you -will find my brain plannin' and my good right hand exeeutin' to win for yer a glorious triutnph at the polls. Just hand me out $100 and 111 send in votes so thick and fast it'll make the inimy crawl ínter a knot-hole." " Oh, blazes," said the oandidate; " I ha ven' t got any $100 to give up; I'm struck for coin on evcry corner. You fellows must think I'm Flood & O'Brien." " Well, I don't know but I might git along with $50," returned the man of influence. " Come to think on it, I guess Icould manage to squeeze through with it; but the boys is powerful absorbent." "Oh, let me alone," said the now thoroughly irritated candidate. " I've got other uses for $50 than giving it to an old stiff likt you." "Me an old stiff!" exclaimed the rustier. "I knowed you didn't know me; I'd scorn to be an old stiff, and if it's any objeck to you to have a man of infloonce working for you among the boys, for the insignificant sum of $25, say so now, or see me arrayed on the side of the inimy next Tuesday." "Oh, go off and die," said the candidate, as he walked away and started to enter the door of a saloon. " Jest one minnit, " said the stiff, as he laid his hand on the candidate's arm ; " yer don't know how yer's throwin' off on yerself ; T'm as dry as a fish, and if a man of infloonce ain't wuth two bits' wuth of wnisky, I'd like ter know what there is in tliis county that's wuth anything." He got the two bits.