Dogs And Tramps

"Am I afraid of dogs?" repeated the tramp, aa he leaned against the wall to rub his itching shoulder, according to the Detroit Free Press. "Well, that's a queer question to ask a fller who'a been on the tramp fur flfteen years! What's dogs got to do with te?" "It Is said that dogs have an instlnctlve aversión to tramps," replied the interviewer. "Mebbe they hev, but the tramp hain't worryin' about that as I knows of. If dogs was all we had to look out fur we'd be a happy lot. Who's bin stuffln' you about dogs?" "Weren't you ever bitten by a dog?" "Of course, but that was when I was green at the biz. After the first six months no dog ever hankered arter my legs. When you read about a farmer's dog humpin' a tramp over the fenee, don't you take no stock in it. It's all guff." "Well, how do you protect yourself?" "In the flrst place, dogs are afraid of tramps. Nine out of ten of 'em will growl a few times and then sneak away. They seem to just ligger that a tramp wouldn't be sloshin' around like he is if he wasn't loaded for dogs. The books all teil ye to look a dog in the eye, but ye do he'll flgger that ye are defying him and bite ye fur sure. Just look at his paws lnstead. That'li bother and anoy him and make him turn tail. If a dog rushes out on me of a sudden I stand still. When he sees I dou't run he argües that I'm dangerous. I've had flfty farmers 'sic' a big dog on me, but I simply back slowly away and never got a bite. I've run onto dogs in yards, barns and sheds and skeert 'em half to death by making a 'buzz-z-z-z-z' with my teeth shut." "But you do flnd a dangerou8 dog once in awhile?" persisted the questioner. "Oh, of course," replied the tramp, as he ecratched the other shoulder. "Yes, we find a dog now and then who lacks good sense and we hev to help him out." "How do you do it?" "With a handful of dry sand or flnecut tobáceo. As he jumps we throw the stuff into hls eyes, and if the owner of the dog haln't clus behind him a feller kin hev ten minutes of solid fun watchin' the circus. That dog may live fur ten years after that date, but he'll never meddle with another tramp. Dogs - humph! Say, gimine a quarter and bring on yer bulldog and teil him to climb fur me!"