Adrian Press Witticisms

Beciiuse the principal eveut of the May musical festival at Anii Albor is "The Flying Dutelunan," it ie no sipn ihat Jake Scliuh wlngs, even if lie is as aeac an Angel as cxy man in Anu Arfoor. The sewing school at Ann Arbor is In -(.'koning the advance agent oL' pros perlty to pat in an appearance, even if he has to back In. No funda are on hand, and to enabie the pupils to take a s'titc-h in time, it seams thcy Deedle little help. Aheni! Ann Arbor men of fair reputation for truth 'and veraeity assert that they heard thunder one night last weck. It was only Sheriff Judson's snoring. He dreamed that Ping hul appoinitïd him warden of the state prison, anl he was trying to voice his gratitnde. Jdawyer Wallace, of Ypsilanti, made a New Vear's resolution to quit lying. Oonsequen'tly he has sold his la w business, quit practico and gone to (irand Rapids, wliere he w.)iks in a fiirnitui-e house. They are so truthful there tliat they won't let a cat lie on the counter. An Ann Arber merchant nained ':ilir lately received 335,000 rolls of wall paper weigiiing over 13 -tons. It is said he has an order to paper Walled Lake. When it comes to house and paperin.s' in the sipring, it has been the invariable custora o-f Aun Arbor Iladies to end their quarrels by going to Wahr. Opera chair have replaced the old wood box se-ats in University hall at Ann Arbor, and coming generations will never know the exquisite torture endure'd by their forefathers and foremöthera. Back, oh back, go our nünds to the past, ih yes, clear back, from the sub cranial apex of the spinal eompilatioa to the fundamental substrueture of punlshment m ehildliood d-ays, when we think of the occasions on whk-h we occupied one of those benches.