Murdered Base Ball

The circus-advertised 'Varsity Faeulty vs. High School Faculty ball gamt came off Wednesday at the athletk grounds, but the treasurer did not get round-shouldered carrying home the swag and the trophy room will never be furnished with Persian rugs, Turkish divans and marble statues If it has to depend on yesterday's attendance for these extravagancies. The 'Varsity faculty held strictly to the amateur rule and did not permit outsiders to break into the organization, while the high school faculty rung in such professionals as the Hon. A. ff. Sawyer, who was introduced at the Professor of Conology; Sid Millard who saíd he was Professor of Typeology; and Frank Simons, who holds the chair of gcoopology. The main feature of the game was the absence of Oliver Martin from the ranks of spectators. This is probably the first time this has happened since the game of baseball was invented, and Mr. Martin malled up The Times this morning and aid that it would never happen again. The first inning opened with the 'Varsity at bat. A. J. Sawyer was playing enter field and started out to cover all three territories. He made three iwful hard bluffs to reach flies and an angelic smile seemed to spread over his countenance when each time he found that they haii never touched ïim. The next ball that came his way, he started to catch it with his feet but not having any boxing gloves on his pedáis the effort was fruitless. He ried it later in the game with more uccess and it looks as if he would do well in an armless ball team. Levi Wines in this inning had a chance to nip a man on first base, but was slower in getting the ball than the Tpsilanti Sentinel is in getting out an edition of its paper. "Heme Run" Pattengill, who, when he was on the University team, knocked the ball further than Burrows' hopes of beating Pingree, seemed to have lost his old baseball lamps and could not solve the curves of Jocelyn. E. F. Johnson stepped up to the plate and there was evidently "Too Much Johnson" as he was given a free pass (don't let Pingree hear of this) to first base on a hit by a pitched ball. By this time the audience commenced to think that the teams were trying to play Shakespeare's "Comedy of Errors" instead of baseball and they were not far off in their 'judgment. When the High School carne to bat it sloon seen that Prof. Trueblood, who held '''pcond position," was one of the very few on the field who was on intímate terms with grounders. He made some very Bloomingstonesque stops and throws. The Hon. A. J. Sawyer carae to bat and every ball that was pitched through evidently looked as small to him as nis estimation of Pingree's brain and he consequently struck out. When the smoke cleared away on the first there were nine runs killed for the University and one for the High School, while several were wounded on both sides. In the second inning Prof. Brandon made a home run on A. J. Sawyer's hoochi-coochi dance after a fly and that was the only one the 'Varsity seored. The High Schools played a kind of a gold brick game in putting out the third 'Varsity player on a fake. When the High Schools came to bat Andy Mack caught a pick-up that made the bleachers stand on their heads and holler as if they were all taking history and afraid of getting eonditions. In this inninff Prof. TYnphlnnri a the only unprofessional act in the game. A grounder, and a hot one, came to him and he acted as if he wished he had a breast protector on that part of his anatomy which comes in handy when one is troubled with that tired feeling but redeemed himself a minute later by catching out Hawkes, who was trying to commit larceny of second base. Jocelyn made a home run on a short hit in which every 'Varsity Selder took a part and it seemed as though every one of them had a tunnel built through their legs the way :he ball got through. This made the carnage stand 10 to 5 in favor of the 'Varsity. In the third inning Sawyer stopped Trueblood's hot grounder Just as if it was a country pettifogger's argument jefore the supreme court. Pattengül nade one of his old-time famous home run drives but ran like a hearse at a uneral and only got as far as second base. In this inning Jocelyn and Springer, the High School battery made a head end collision after a pop ly- the second occurrence of the kind n the game- and gave a resuseitatinn o a man that ought to have been dead. The inning was marked by the number of drives into center field and V -1. Sawyer worked as hard as if he was defending a murderer. Andy Mack was on first base and one time in his inning and Sid Millard in making bluff to throw to. thfi hnm niai aught him in a bad notion of eoingn to second base. Junie Beal made one-handed stop that surprised him S mu:htuas e had picked up a opy oí the Register and seen an ediorial indorsing George Pond for postmaster. The feature of the inning was he fact that Typeology Millard put out ie side. When the High Schools came to bat A. J. Sawyer made a swipe like one f his Fourth oí July speeches, but ld not want to see what the bases ooked hke and Springer did the sprintng for him. Andy Mack made a ouple of jïhcnonienal stops and the ombardment ended with a score of 19 o 5 in favor of the 'Varsity t0HrtK act Pene(J with Junie Beal m the box. He started to pitch nder the rules of 1876, which allowed he twirler to make a flying e He eyidently thought this was aUoV irt ln,,th's l.easue but Umpire Watins called him down. A. J. Sawyer made a stop wtih his feet, and or Th"6. ?iï the minds of the sPecta" ors that this was .the only way he ■■ld liandle grounders. as his front eranda prevented his stooping to any AmivC'aMle In this inning Andy Mack was really put out nn asn t and Andy Mack, being a calm rot sass him back a bit. The Hie-h Schools scored one, while the 'Yarsitv The feature of the fifth inning was' tne fact that the High Schools shut out the 'Varsity. The spectators seemed to be getting disgusted with the good playlng and many left the grounds The 'Varsity only Iet the High Schools get in two runs and the ledger stood 22 to 8 in favor of the 'Varsity. The two teams really had the' nerve to play a sixth inning, althougli the crowd was "murder," "help " and "pólice," and ihe final score wás 24 to 8 in favor of the U. of M seeming neglect in the management was that it had not provided bromoseltzers for the audience for bracers after the delirium-tremens base'oall exhibition. ïnnings 1 2 3 4 5 ó R. H. E. 'arsity I-aculty 9 1 8 4 0 2 2 20 s H. S. Ifacultj 1 40120 8 7 9 Stolen bases- Nearly every one that was reached by a base runner. Home runs- 250 spectators after the fiflh inning, First base on balls- Several. First base on errors - More. Left on bases- One of Sawyer's pants buttons a drop of E. F. Johnson's sweat, and the hopes of several players. Hit by the pitchers- Several clubs in the hands of batsmen. Doublé plays- Each player searched and none found. Time Wednesday afternoon. Batteries- 'Varsity, Townley and Patterson; High School, Springer and Jocelyn, Jocelyn and Springer, Springer and Beal. Umpires, Watkins and Clarke