Wit And Humor

TliTQ i a nrin i:i Sin Fratiniíoo so rn-luced by coitsmnptiou tliat he livos eutiruly upoii stiiiiulanta aud lus relations. "Now tilia is wliat I cill biMinw," rem u-keil un un lort i kor, aa au unibrtiniíitc geutlonuiB 8tepe L iaij li is store un 1 die I. A taH man h-ivin r rilliol hit fríen 1 on che sIioi-Ijicss oí' IiLh e;s, tha iVion I tvplio.l : ''Mv le ís reanli iho groan.l ; v iiil, moro c ni yours úo'í" ][e wís f'roiii (lio molí 1 1 tai n si(lc,in I W:lS buyitlsf Illa fír+t gliISS ot' sod '. - "I Vi' j s I i you'd akim otf tliat soinn, bos-; ; i iiiu't jjayiüg íor no i'rolli. yon bul.." "'iVIint is t!io worst thiii aijont riches?" iskud i Suiuliy Buliool toaclicr. ''Theii: Bofiroiiy," replied tlio boy, and h; vis iuiíiic; .ialuiy awarded u cliruino. "llow nmiy doaths?" asked tho hospital pliy.-iiciau, wúilu fíoiug liis i'uun Ís. "linio." "Vr.iy, 1 oivtored ínciliciiie tor ion." "yes, but oae vvouldii't Uiku it." Youiij; tariuor - "Are yon fond of beutiis, Miss GuHlicruíiii1" Misa GusherDou - 'Olí, reu.ily, Mr. l'.iu'ker, if yon mean tnat as a ueclumtioii, you musí. Süuak to ni minia." "O:in there be happlness vrbere llicru is no lovy?" soluiiiiily querius na auilior in a book on niarri.iíe. Not ïmich huppiuu.ss, peruaps ; but if tiu givi is awiulJy non, tlioru cm bc lo oí Ai ii. A ricb Scotch man at the point ot dcatli, s.iid 10 lus pistor: "Da you tllUlK it 1 lel'l LiU,UUÜ Lo tliü l're-iuytcriati uhurcii niy soul vvill besaveJ?" "1 ean't proinise you anyLliiiu," auBWerod tuu good iii;ui alter a seooud tUoug'ht, 'Liut il's worlli Li-yni." "Doii't you want to bc my wifc?" said a 8 mail boy to a similor g'irl. - AVith sume hesitaúon, but witli a curtaiu tiniinuss ol' tone, she replieil, '■ïes, i would." "Tuüii," contiiiueii the boy, as lm se:ited hinisolf on the grass and j if tod up lus loot, liyou uiay begiu by puliiug oil niy booLs," AVhtm a mui in a Vcrniont grocery store was siLtiiu1 upou the edge oí the counter, and liis icol slipped ana he niUcd tue vvhoie luntli oi his back 6n tlie countiT's edgu, and sat square ilown in a bushel bdskecofes WJiich sioDit rlglit where lic oouldn't miss it, t)je gl'Oour was horriliod, and cxclaiuijid : " vVas it au accident?" And tlio viciiin replied : "JJy criinus, air, it' you insinúate tliat i skun niy úickand got inyscit into tuis iiiuss on purpose, 111 jam your board into llie rouiains oi those o ■ ná V - Boston lJost, Ouo ot' the íhsliiuiis is a ncw langh, wmuii gol like tuw ; 'i.Ns-ue, tc-uel Um, Jitt, na! Ja-h-ll-ll - lia, ha, lnil' 'i. no mroctious tro as ioilovvs: "A low miii sly bejiliniu is mulo wiu tilo lie lis tiioiijíii inirt.li was sirugiing insiue to ol'ouk oíil tiirougi muia-ciily reservo, nn 1 tlie moatb id kopt lilHly uij.ícu, wiulo tiio oyo.i aro opunod vvitlo, lutij giViu mi ux.proisuii ui üiiii ,1l(I iluiilurjUt'Sá aiui uiisoliievousiiü8. Tuoii íollows tilo 'lia, ha, im,' liijuor tiiitl loador, wit.i U Ll'llil Ul LilO ÍLíJS LU tillo SY UU Loui.i, 11 Liiuy uo ivüiüo ana ro0uur. - Tiio U.i, ii-ii ooino.5 lieiL ni i Ijiio oí buryi'ioe, roji)ti, ur uriloss L..ylj, aocui'uiii Lu tiio ii.tlAiro )l tito tuiii3 1 ,11 ,I1Om II, .tll.L L.U VlCO lisO.-i HllU t iH'OLiy IilliC öci'oaiti. Xiio üiióUill paiiio covoi'o a s.ia 4011 sousj ol o.io i,iurupriuky t niniitisouiíoli noise,L.iu uyo.3 aro O.1.5U itj v n, tu t 1 jitioti 0.1.1 LU illUUiOoá io [)i'o tttoovl uy' lioultti L110 oroaia vvitn uk luua vory íuiiy iiillatoa. Tae ttiiiii 'li.i, ia, li;i.' isyivon as a crosceiKiu, spiruoaiy ami wiüiiut, auy show ot reatiMiut, iiko tio 011 1btirslni-;' iiihirity ui ;ui UOüOUVUlltioual niiikui.ti 1. Tuis novo Hy 111 latían is licura evorywuoro m luo niou-oolis úua is sui-u to U como popumr. - - - - - This scason a now branch of industry lta-i boon SLartüit by ftlieruicn aiony tho Cties ipoako. Thoy Jiavc takoii to breeding soft oraba lor the iinirkot,, aiul tliusiiir it iias beeu a very pi'oiitaolu business, sinoc tlicro is 110 outlay exoopt Ihc labor ( ouo or tivu iaën al cticli placo wliere itiscarned 011. T.10 plan is to oatcli as mauy crab.s as possible, tako lliom 11 p a sinaíl i 11 lot or bay, íuiiídeposit tlicm beliiml wtros, whero llioy eau havo tiio livedoni oí tiio water au.i plenty to e ,it. üy carcí'ully waiclung ilieni, 111 expei'ietiecd man is ablo to tel 1 as 8OOI1 ua a haixi crab shedí bis slioJl aud becouics soit. As soou as Jic doos lic is taken out and brouylil La markct. A.s eveiy hard Clilb must soonei1 or ltttor buooiuu a sof'L-shi'll cnil), tlioro is no lost material, líaviiíjí beoonie a "soí't," i lie crab rema i na so thive days, tliougli, os a rule, lie is markeiCil ana eaien belore tliat time. The plan ol' g'etliiy sot't eraüs oí' market luis herúiolbro béou tu waLcli íor tliem along' sliore, so that llildor clio nev )lan tlure is no reasou wiiy sol't eraba uliould bequolod high.