Fooling The British

Bbooklyk, April ÍK.- In 1812 the English sloop of war Sylph went ashore in a gale off Southampton aud every one on board was lost but the purser. He was washed on the beach insensible. In reviving him his rescuers were obliged to cut his boots from hia feet. On ooming to, his first act was to treat his preservers to every oath at that time in use in tho British navy, for spoillng his boots. He was kept as a prisoner of war in a sociable sort of fashion at the house of a relativo of mine, and af ter the peace went to New York, engaged in business and made a fortune. His name was Parsons. A boat load of English came on shore at Montauk point one day from the fleet, killed one of Mr. Hand's cows and carried it on board. Hand impressed an Indian at the point of his rawhide to paddie him in a canoe to the admiral's ship. He clambered over the side and, when asked his business, said he wanted to be paid for that c-ow, and if he was not paid he (Hand), with his one Indian, his canoe and his rawhide, would "take it out of the English fleet." The admiral being informed of this demand, enforced by two men, one canoe and a rawhide, came on deck, and, telling Hand that he waa the bravest and most impudent American or any other man he ever heard of, ordered that he should be paid. This is another proof of the saying that no one ever knows what he can do tiil he tries. Many a monumental ton óf stone stands over reputed héroes who could not do what Hand did. Napoleon would have made Hand a marshal- if of nothing else, of a torchlight procesión. I ara not quite certain that his name was Hand. But he belonged to one of the half dozen original families constituting the village of Amagansett, the most easterly settlement of Long Island, and any one down there will give you his right name, if it was not Hand. During the war of 1812 the people of Kast Hampton kept a cannon on the town commons to be fired as an alarm signal if the English landed. It was fired one night, and the town turned out, some with muskets and some in their night gowns, to repel the invaders. But the invader would not be repelled, because he hadn't come. He was on the fleet, awakened by the report, and wondering who might be about to attack him. Tt was only a cow which had alarmed the easily frightened sentinel- a cow which had advanced but could not give the countersign when hailed. Now, my uncle, Jeremiah Mulf ord , was a bom scamp. He relished the alarm and all the consequent excitement, and wantod more of it So he concluded he'd have that gun fired over again. He put up the job with two other lesser scamps. Friction matches were not known in those days. so the alarmists kept the school house wood flre burning all night to secure the live coal necessary to touch off the gun. Jeremiah rammed down the charge with a stove handle, touched her off, was knocked down by the recoil of the piece, got up half blinded, ran home, crawled into the window and into bed as everybody else was getting out "armed and equipped as the law directs. " The men were taking down fiiutlock muskets with shaking hands, tbe women were putting up the shutters to barricade the houses. Jeremiah heard one of the town's prominent men, as he rode up to the house of bis sou-in-law, crying out: "Daniel I Daniel! Get upl One gun's gone off, and another's going pretty soon 1" The town was "sold again," and many were glad to be sold out in this way. The selectmen offered a reward for the offenders. Jeremiah was an uncommonly good and quiet boy for many days. His sister, my Aunt UrEula, had her suspicions, for she knew he was generally either at the bottom or top of all the miscbief done in the place. It was he who had once inserted a chestnut burr under the tail of her young man's mare, causing that animal distressing physical sensations and its rider resulta stül more agonizing. There was another man who suspected Jeremiah. It was the old "codger" who made all the hickory ax helves and hoe handjes for the town. He had found one of his hoe handles near th gun next morning and knew the family it belonged to. He knew Jerry also. He met Jerry in a retired spot about a week af terward and confronted him with tbat hoa handle. But he made no charge. He said only: "Jerry- Jerry- hum- isn't this your hoe handle i" Jerry' face was one of impervious innocence. "Jerry I Jerry I Oh, Jerry I" said the hoe handle detective, and then he siniled and walked away. He never "peached."