Josh Billings' Philosophy

A weak man for a friend iz ful] aa unsafe az a krazzy one. 1 f yoa kan't reach a man witli politeness, try a klub on him. Flatttry often may be innosent, but it iz never but one remove from deeepshun. Thare iz no animal so cunning az the fox, and thare iz none that iz huntétí that iz oftener kaught. Mi deax friend, don't talk foo ñ.'.fih thare iz uo diet so remorsele.is na te have to eat your own words. A coquet iz Hke a kikinglieifer- drdphull hard to brake, but once brok?, nothiu' iz more tame than she iz. Averice, when it takes full posseshun of yeiur harte, roots out all other things, good, bad and indifferent. H iz quite possible to tell how mutch branes a man haz got, but to tell hnx íuutch harte iz another thing enr!Pely. I havf lmowu men to be squealched bi a singlo word, and even by a single lo-ok; but never knu a tirade ov '0 niiaDitts to do it. I luv a speshialty; it shows karackfer ov sum kind. I kno a ma n in Pordunk who kan beai tho worid sneezing, and I luv him for it. The man who won't bfcleave eanything he kan't understand, ain't a going to beleave mutch, nor understand mutch, neither. When I see a man who iz in an awphull blg hurry i anj apt to think ho hain't got much to do, and haz got lots ov time to do it in. Mi dear boy, remember thls, thare ain't no thing that kan kompensate yu for doing a thing thfl you wlíj be 'shawl c{p SL{tr 1% do.